That's the Flaming Lips there with a song that they sang.
It's called the Yeah Yeah Yeah song.
There you go.
Hi, this is Adam.
Yeah, this is Joe.
Welcome to the Breakfast Show here on 6 Music.
We're with you till 10am.
Hope you're feeling very well this morning.
Physically and medically, you know.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You should be, because it's a lovely day.
It's another night's day.
Yeah, a good bank holiday yesterday, Joe.
Well, it was quite short for us, wasn't it?
Yeah.
Because it started at like 11am and finished at 9pm.
I watched a film, though.
What did you watch?
Had a couple of friends around.
We projected a film up.
Uh, it was called... No, it was called The Reaping.
The Reaping.
Yeah.
Is that with, um, Lady Man in it?
Hilary Swank.
Hilary Swank.
Mmm.
That's a good name to say on a Tuesday morning, isn't it?
And was it fantastic?
No, it was rubbish.
Oh, what?
Yeah, it was terrible.
Listen, I could have told you it was gonna be rubbish.
I knew it was gonna be.
I don't know.
That was one of the two DVDs that you got on some purchase mission, and the other one was what?
Mr. Bean's Holiday.
Mr. Bean's Holiday.
I've seen everything.
What are you like?
I've seen everything.
Why don't you just get like, you've got cats, haven't you?
Why don't you just watch the cat?
Mr. Bean was quite good.
Playing around with a ball of wool or something, Mr. Bean, I'm sure Mr. Bean was better than like, oh.
Like that kind of business.
Does he speak in those films?
Uh, yeah, he does.
It's always a bit weird when they start speaking from nowhere, isn't it?
It's like what Tom and Jerry...
The non-talking people.
Yeah.
Like when Tom and Jerry start chatting, you know?
No, he does.
Mr Bean is a really weird film.
I'd like to hear about it.
It's really odd.
Very much indeed.
Listen, we've got great music for you.
Who's your session by?
My session is by... That's a very good question.
Who is my session by?
Oh, it's by Corner Shop.
Corner Shop, nice.
And it's early Corner Shop even.
It's early Punky Corner Shop.
That's right.
People forget that before Corner Shop became a kind of funky unit,
They were ajut prop.
I mean, they were always fairly ajut in their props.
But, man, they used to be a real shouty little outfit.
While it's on a shouty track.
You've got some shouty corner shop.
I've got some incredibly mellow tortoise.
Wonderful kind of mainly instrumental Chicago band.
And I'll be playing a peal session of theirs a bit later on.
At least a track from it.
We'll be texting the nation at about 8 o'clock.
We're going to have our serial thriller also at 8 o'clock.
Everything's happening at 8.
Yeah, before then, it's like a vast desert of triviality and nothingness.
But it's filled.
There's little oases in the desert of music.
And right now, here's one of those.
It's the Go Team.
We're doing it right.
That's the fourth form of St.
Wilfred's Grammar School.
And that's their end of year song.
And they'll all be in detention.
They're all in detention.
Because it was a bit of a mess.
It was a little bit of a mess.
They only practiced a couple of days for that.
And so that's not bad considering that but they should have been in practice for at least two weeks and Mrs. Harold is very upset about it.
Harold?
Harold.
She's their form teacher.
Of course it was the go team with doing it right.
And this is Adam and Jo here covering for Sean Keveny.
We've only got like three more days after this.
I know it's gone very quickly hasn't it?
Yeah, and then we're gonna be sleeping all day.
All day in the street.
And sleeping in the street.
It's gonna be exciting.
Now, I was having some problems this morning with my printer.
Just as I was coming out of the house.
You know, obviously I'm on top of everything.
I've done some notes for the show.
Well done.
I thought I'm going to print these notes out and then I'll have them handy and I'll be able to refer to them during the radio show that we're doing.
So the printer wouldn't do the printing.
It's going through a stage right now where it refuses to feed the paper through the actual printing mechanism.
So it clicks at me, and the kind of mouth of the thing, you can hear it opening and closing.
Do you know what I'm saying?
And the paper goes... What's its problem?
Do you think?
I don't know what its problem is, but it's a nightmare, and it means that this has been happening now for... a year?
And it means that, um, most of the time I have to manually feed the paper threader.
Tease it for you, man.
It's good for you.
You reckon?
Yeah.
Like I'm feeding a little bird.
That's what Charles Dickens did.
No, it isn't.
He did.
He manually fed.
He had to paper into his epsilon.
Into his printer.
Inkjet printer, yeah.
That's outrageous.
And listen, I've been thinking, this is more than my life's worth because it's reached a stage now where this labour-saving device of mine is no longer saving me labour but actually creating labour for me.
It would be simpler for me to write in longhand the things that I wish to print.
You know what I mean?
It would save me more time.
New printer?
New printer.
You'd think that was the solution, wouldn't you?
But about a year ago, I went on a cartridge splurge.
Yes.
And I thought, I'm fed up of running out of ink.
I'm gonna buy a year's worth of ink cartridges.
And it cost me almost a thousand pounds.
the ink splurge, you know, because those cartridges are really expensive, yeah, not for nothing to their, like, Huxes sell those ludicrous, uh, syringe devices, yeah, yeah, where you can refill the cartridges.
So I've got about a grand swath of ink cartridges for this printer that no longer works, and I went online to see if I could find another printer that takes the same cartridge, nothing, absolutely nothing!
So I'm stuck with the same malfunctioning printer that I have to feed like a lame bird every time I wanna print something out, it's a total nightmare!
and I was just wanting to get it off my chest.
Well well done you have.
Thank you!
There we go, more printer news the same time next year.
Here's what this it says here, radio he's we can only assume it's radio head with fake plastic trees.
That's a very irresponsible trait.
It's drawing a comparison between six music and some sort of hideous drug that someone would put in your drink in a nightclub.
Exactly.
Six music, the Rohippnol of the Big British Castle.
That's what they seem to be saying.
Either that or they're suggesting that it's like some kind of sexual thing.
I've lost all my trust in the media.
So have I. I used to rely on the media to be honest.
Well, exactly.
You watch a corrupt harlot.
You'd watch a telly program and you'd think, that's the way it happened.
Yeah, I thought Michael Barrymore was lovely.
They're giving me the facts.
He was the lanky funster running up and down those stairs pressing those buttons on those TVs.
That's right.
And in this documentary, this is an actual representation of what happened.
And why would they... I thought those were real owls.
Why would they lie?
Why?
Why would they lie?
Is this true that you know that BBC programme Spring Watch?
With Bill Odey.
Yeah.
Is it true, listeners, you might be able to tell me this, but they had a season of that, didn't they, earlier in the year?
Yeah.
That at one point during kind of children's television, they cut to some owls and a big mummy owl and some baby owls.
Right.
And they were talking about how sweet they were when suddenly the mummy owl picked up the weakest baby owl in its beak.
and fed it alive to the other baby owls.
Nobody wants to see that.
This is what owls do, apparently.
It's the natural way of things, but apparently that kind of went out live on children's television and traumatised a lot of young viewers.
Is that true?
Listeners, did anybody see that?
A nation of owl fanciers.
Because there's nature's truthfulness bursting through.
That's a shame, isn't it?
Is that a shame?
Yeah, because owls are lovely creatures.
Children love them.
Not that lovely.
You know, not anymore.
No one likes to be an owl now, do they?
Yeah.
What?
The end.
Here's Peter, Bjorn and John.
What are you doing?
I'm freestyling.
Freestyling of Peter Bjorn and John.
This is going to be a valuable remix of that song.
Yeah.
I've got a version with Joe Cornish with Lin on the end.
Then it's Freestyle with Lin.
No, I haven't.
That was Young Folks by Peter Bjorn and John.
This is Adam and Joe here on BBC Six Music.
It's time now for my session track.
This is pulled from the John Peel Sessions Archives.
And it is by the band Tortoise who come from Chicago.
And I believe that Tortoise are variously featured members of other bands, including Jim O'Rourke, an artist in his own right, who was... He's very good.
He's great, isn't he?
A brilliant solo artist, also produced Wilco and Sonic Youth.
Maybe he's like the extra member of Sonic Youth now, I can't remember.
And also members of a band called The Sea and Cake.
They're very good as well.
Yeah, they're excellent.
An offshoot from Tortoise.
Maybe I'd like Tortoise.
I'm sure you would if I like those two.
Their classic album is considered to be an album called Millions Now Living Will Never Die.
And, uh, uh, Lisa stopped doing the windy hand signal.
I'm just explaining who taught us are for people who are interested.
I'm sure many people are very bored by what I'm saying.
Okay, and I know you're one of them.
But I'm talking to the two people who are interested in this and taking notes about Taurus.
Right, I'm taking notes.
Anyway, this is not from that classic album.
It's a track from an album called TNT, which is also amazing.
And it's got one of the most long, pretentious names ever in the history of music.
But I believe it's taken from a kind of art poem.
It's called In Serra, Menken, Christ and Beethoven There Were Men and Women by Taurus from The Peel Sessions.
Oh, isn't that?
That's lovely, isn't it?
That's lovely.
It's like a lovely dream.
That's a slightly truncated version of Tortoise's Peel Session, with a track called In Sera, Mink and Christ and Beethoven.
They were men and women.
Now it's time for the news on BBC 6 Music, read by Nicola and Ruth.
That's Green Day with Welcome to Paradise.
This is Adam and Joe here on 6 Music.
We're filling in for Sean Kievny.
for a couple of weeks and this is our second week we're having a good time and we've inherited a number of Sean's features his swarthy good looks his long legs I'm joking of course I'm talking about our audio features sonic features and one of them that he does on this show where we're told is called band aid and it's some kind of
effort to raise money
the person with the most votes gets to play their track in its entirety.
And that's exactly what we're doing this week.
And I'm going to speak to one of our featured artists right now, and we have him on the line.
Are you there?
Hello.
Hi, it's... What's your name?
My name's Joe, Joe Cornish.
Joe Cornish.
Yeah, hi.
Hi, it's exciting.
Are you excited to be part of Band Aid this week?
Very, very excited just to be on the radio.
Yeah, well, it's a great opportunity for a young artist.
And perhaps you could tell us a little bit about your track.
What's it called, first of all?
Adam, my track's called... It's sort of an ambient techno track.
It's called European Supermarket.
And it's kind of a song about what it's like to go abroad.
to Europe and go into a supermarket, how exciting it is to, how exciting and confusing it is to go shopping in a supermarket in Europe.
All the different products etc.
All the products it can be confusing and well you should just listen to the track, it's really danceable, it's intriguing, it's mysterious, it's kind of a bit like Kraftwerk.
Across with maybe the pet shop boys.
Mm-hmm.
It's really really good.
That's a beguiling sounding mix Should we have a quick listen to a clip right now?
Yeah
That's amazing.
Whereabouts in the song does that happen?
Is that a clip from the middle there or right at the beginning?
That's about, I'd say, ten seconds into the song.
Yeah.
How long is the whole song, if you don't mind me asking?
The song's two minutes.
Two minutes?
Yeah, songs are getting shorter because kids get bored really easily.
Sure.
So there's been a sort of agreement across the industry to cut down the length of songs.
Well, that sounds fantastic.
Remind us of the name of the track again shopping in...
No, it's called European Supermarket, Adam.
European Supermarket.
European Supermarket.
That's how the chorus goes.
OK, good one.
Well, listen, Joe Cornish, thanks very much.
Vote for me.
Vote for Joe Cornish.
Thanks very much indeed for talking to us.
Very shortly, we'll have our other band-aid competitor on the phone, and we'll be chatting to them about their track.
But right now, here's Katie Tunstall with Hold On.
That was Katie Tunstall with Hold On.
This is Adam and Joe on BBC 6 Music.
As Adam was explaining before that track, this morning we're launching an exciting competition, it's called Band Aid, and we'd like you to go to our website, what's the website Jenny?
BBC www.bbc.co.uk forward slash six music.
log on to our little site there, and we'd like you to vote, we'd like you to choose between two tracks, one of which is by the exciting new ambient techno artist, Joe Cornish, and the other of which is by an artist who I think is on the line right now, nigh.
Hello, are you there?
Hi, Joe, yes, hello.
Hello, what's your name?
Hi, my name's Adam Buxton.
Hey, Adam.
I'm from London.
Where are you calling from right now, specifically?
I'm from London.
But yeah, but where are you actually calling from in London?
Oh, sorry, sorry.
London.
London, OK.
Now, Adam, you've submitted a track that we're going to put up for Band Aid this week here on The Breakfast Show.
Can you tell us a little bit about it?
Yes, this is a track called Jane's Brain and it's a rock and roll track.
It's got guitars in it and drums and a bass and it's mainly for rocking and it's
a rock track okay and you you wrote this and perform it yourself Adam yes it's entirely performed by me Adam Buxton and it's called James Brain and it was inspired by it was inspired by a girl called Jane and the idea that she might have a brain and she would use it to think about things and what was it inspired by it was it wasn't it wasn't inspired by anything I just made it up when I first
Okay, let's hear a little, let's hear a little snatch of that record.
Wow, so did you hear, that sounds really good Adam.
Yeah, thanks very much.
That's the bit, that's the bit of the song where she's thinking about cars and fancy dresses.
Yeah, and so did you hear the clip from Jo's track earlier, a few minutes ago?
Yeah, the German Tecmo one.
It was about shopping.
Yeah.
Yeah, I didn't like it.
You didn't like it?
No, I thought it was... Not as good as yours.
Not as good as mine.
No offense to Joe.
You know, I think he's really good.
He's a really good artist.
But I don't like that kind of music.
You know what I mean?
I think it's a little bit for pansies.
So who do you think is going to win in this battle?
Well, I think there's a good chance that Adam Buxton and me could win because I do the rock and people generally like rock.
Yeah, well it's not what our polls are showing us, Adam.
We've got a lot of support for Joe Cornish out there, I think.
So, you know, prepare yourself to take a blow.
Thanks for coming on, Adam.
So there we go.
there we go listeners log on to www.bbc.co.uk forward slash six music you can hear both of those snatches of the tracks and it's a very simple interface you can vote for your favorite with just one click we'll be doing this all week and we'll be playing the winner in full at the end of the week and now it's trail time in session on Gideon Co's show Harrison the hub that'll be brilliant playing live there's a party round at my hub he's not gonna have hugs for us
Hugs?
Yeah, he's only got hugs for you if you were born in the 80s.
Oh, he likes much younger ladies.
Yeah, we were born in the 50s.
We don't get anything except handouts.
Now, it's time for my archive session track.
This is my selection from John Peele's classic recordings.
This is from January 1993.
Now, when I looked down the list, I was excited to see Corner Shop.
Because you love a bit of Tejinder Singh.
I do, but then when I got the actual CD, it was very different from what I expected.
It shocked you, didn't it?
I thought it was going to be sort of noodle-y, jangle-y, dance-y sort of fun business.
And it kind of is, but in a much more punky fashion.
And Adam here had to give me a little lesson about the early history of Corner Shop.
Yeah, not that I'm an expert, but I certainly remember... But you knew more than me.
I remember them in the old days, staring out from the NME as a quite furious little punk outfit.
And this is from those days.
You know, with these peal sessions, he was so prescient, so ahead of his time, so ahead of the curve, that a lot of the bands that one digs out really have a very different sound, a very primitive sound.
Yeah, exactly.
This is right at the beginning.
Yeah, so here's Cornershop.
This track's called England's Dreaming.
It was recorded on the 17th of January 1993.
Wow, a very different kind of corner shop there for you this morning.
Not your traditional corner shop, more a corner shop selling Molotov cocktails, dangerous fireworks, chainsaws, and bother boots.
That's right.
But good stuff there, man.
From Appeal Sessions, a track called England's Dreaming.
That goes to show you how artists can develop and change.
It does, doesn't it?
When was Brimful of Asher?
What year was it?
Ninety-seven, I think.
Ninety-seven, so that's four years between that and Brimful of Asher.
So what you're saying is in that four-year period, they changed.
Yes.
Yay.
It's an interesting theory.
But they change quite a lot.
Adam is what I'm saying.
I see.
It's what I'm trying to say to kids out there who might have a sort of a thrashy unkempt band.
Right, right.
And their mums and dads are going, that noise is awful.
It'll never get anywhere.
Mmm.
Don't listen to Mum and Dad.
No, something refined always forms from the sputum.
Exactly.
Keep going.
Uh, you know, gawkies were like that as well.
Really?
The Psygotic Monkey started out sounding very similar to the track you just played, but from Corner Shop.
The Arctic Monkeys are still like that.
Oh, yeah, but they're good at it, man.
You know what I mean?
The thing is to play to your strengths, and Corner Shop obviously realized that, good as they were at that, shouty stuff, they were, uh, you know, they're calling lay elsewhere, and the gawkies were the same.
They turned into wonderful melodic folksters.
and the monkeys I hope they never stop shouting because they're the best at it that's my personal opinion now here's a public service announcement to all listeners we'd like you to get up and feel like being a sex machine
Yes you can James.
That's Jimmy Brown with Get Up and Be Sexy or whatever it's called.
Get up!
I feel like being a sex machine.
Yeah.
For the first time you ever heard that track.
Yeah and it was like wow this is the best thing I've ever heard in my life.
I went to the record shop and bought a 12 inch that turned out to be a stupid mega mix.
and James Brown Megamix.
It was called the Froggy Mix.
dangerous exactly and if you're not properly trained no make sure you've established an intimate relationship with somebody first yeah yeah you can get into all sorts of trouble and some women get very angry machine like behavior generally it's not good try and be try and be a human yes exactly and with that thought it's time for the news read by Nicola and Ruth that's quite an adenoidal performance and waking up in bed with Corgan
He's got a very blocked nose.
That's the smashing pumpkins with that's the way.
Open brackets.
My love is closed brackets.
I'm going till I can't hear.
That's how I'm talking with you.
Is he American?
What nationality was he there?
He puts on an American accent.
Does he?
Yes.
They all do.
They all these from Skuntorp.
No, he's not from Skuntorp.
He's from London.
It's serial thriller time here on the Adam and Jo breakfast show on BBC six music.
This is the time of the show when we get a caller, a listener who has called to vote for two tracks back to back to give us a chance to have some brekkie.
To have some breakfast, I've got a delicious banana.
You've eaten it already, you BBC liar!
Lies!
That'll be in the papers tomorrow!
Buxton announced he had a full banana, when clearly in plain sight there was a spent banana peel.
Well, you never know, I might have another one in my bag.
It's true.
It's true, isn't it?
You'd be the liar.
Yeah, then you'd be the liar.
Ah, the big British castle.
Yeah.
Now, Chris, are you there?
Hello.
How are you doing?
I'm very well, thank you.
Now you're in Norwich, aren't you?
I'm actually from Norwich.
I'm actually in London.
Really?
Well done.
You've made it.
You've made it.
How much is it exciting for you in London?
Do you feel dizzy around the big buildings?
It's terribly exciting.
Is it choked by the pollutants?
Yeah, a few less farmers, which is a bit disconcerting, but apart from that, it's all very enjoyable.
Norwich is a nice place though, isn't it?
That's where my... It's a fine city.
My family in law are from, and I like Norwich.
I think it's an exciting place.
And Chris, what do you do?
It sounded a bit more convincing.
It didn't sound sincere, did it?
I actually mean that.
I like Norwich a lot.
Chris, what do you do now that you're in London?
I'm a journalist.
Ah, what kind of journalist?
A music journalist.
That's not really a real journalist, though, is it, Chris?
Oh, I don't know about that.
Someone has to write about these things.
What some publication do you write for there, Chris?
I write for Virgin Media.
For their web presence?
Web and WAP, mainly.
And WAP?
Ooh, wow.
All very new media.
Do people use WAP?
Um, increasingly so.
Really?
It's not a term you hear said a lot, is it?
It was big about four or five years ago and then people suddenly stopped saying it.
People say mobile internet these days.
Do they?
Nobody, I know.
Well, WAP, they've got to think of a new phrase for WAP, because it just sounds rubbish.
It just sounds like... What is it precisely, Chris?
What does WAP stand for?
Wireless?
Wireless Application Protocol, I believe.
Wireless.
Okay.
What about space vision?
That's much better, you see.
Yeah, because the pictures and the words come from space.
That's pretty much it.
I'll come back to Richard Branson today.
Thanks a lot.
Are you mates with Richard Branson?
And sadly not, no.
No, I probably want to be mates with Richard Branson.
It's got to be easy.
He's got that amazing island, what's it called, Necker?
Necker Island, yeah.
We met Branson, man.
Don't you remember?
We were on the plane one time.
We didn't meet him.
He went around and sort of papily blessed everybody on the plane.
He happened to be on the same flight as us one time when we were going to America, the land of dreams.
And he came down and shook hands with every single person on the flight.
And listen, I was excited about it.
I was really genuinely excited.
It was like a visit from the headmaster.
Adam was excited because he knew the plane was much less likely to crash.
That's true.
I always feel happier if there's a famous person on board.
Have you met him, Chris?
I haven't met.
What's going on?
Now Chris, we've got an anecdote here about you.
This was supplied by you to our producer, and she's transcribed it, and I'm now going to read it out.
Chris went to a stag do, and the actor who plays Des Barnes in Coronation Street was there.
It wasn't his stag do, nor did he know the stag, he was just there.
Yeah, I did write that, although I didn't write it in the third person, as you just presented it.
Is that a true story, Chris?
It is, yes.
It was up in Hull last year.
A good friend of mine, Emmeline, was getting married.
And, um, uh, Dez Palms was staying in the same hotel, and we kept sitting in the kind of activities that we'd planned, like he was... What kind of activities had you planned?
That sounds slightly sinister.
Sounds sort of like motor racing.
Right.
uh dancing no killings no killing man no good no no exactly they don't allow it no um and uh man that's that's quite an anecdote you've got there surely you've you've accrued more exciting celebrity encounters than that in your time as a music journalist
Yes, but that's, you know, not involving the former Coronation Street stars.
Fair enough, yeah.
You're right.
That has a sort of inverse glamour that's more powerful than meeting a famous person.
It's the sixth music demographic, I believe.
Exactly.
That's very well tailored.
That's right.
Now, Chris, can you tell us about the tracks you've chosen today, please?
Um, Doves, There Goes the Fear.
Oh, yeah.
Now, was that from their big, big selling album?
Yeah, the last broadcast, their second album.
Yeah, it was the one that sort of broke them through, wasn't it?
Yeah, it's just a superb track.
The drumming at the end is mind-blowing.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Drumming at the end, we'll keep an ear out for that.
Yeah.
And what's the second track there, Chris?
It's Oh Yeah by Ash off the debut album 1977.
And we're told that you're in the video, is that right?
I am indeed, yes.
Are there a lot of people in the video?
Sorry?
Are there a lot of people in the video?
Yeah, there's about 15 to 20 youngsters.
I was about 16 at the time.
Really?
Wow!
Okay, well we'll... We're kind of mooching around.
We'll try and imagine you bopping around, even though we don't know what you look like.
We'll just try and guess.
Chris, thank you so much for talking to us today.
We really appreciate it, and thanks for your choices.
They're excellent.
Not a problem.
Take care, have a good day, and here is Doves.
Thank you, have a good day, bye.
Bye!
Text-a-nation!
Text, text, text!
Text-a-nation!
What if I don't want to?
Text-a-nation!
But I'm using email!
Is that a problem?
It doesn't matter!
Text!
It feels like ages since we heard the Text the Nation jingle.
It does, doesn't it?
We didn't have it yesterday because it was a special retro day.
It was almost four days ago that we lost it.
Oh, it's lovely to hear it again.
It's great to hear it again in its slightly longer form.
Yeah.
Making it clear that even though it's called Text the Nation, you're welcome to submit entries as an email or as a handwritten letter, a fax, a telegram, any way you want to.
Yeah, the text number is 64046.
The email is adamandjo.6musicatbbc.co.uk.
Today's text the nation question is, what's the biggest argument you've ever had over the stupidest, smallest thing?
Something that started out as just the germ of a little discussion, and then it turned into a disagreement.
via by way of a contra-ton and then it turned into a giant cataclysmic shout fest and then maybe spiraled totally out of control and ended in violence or even death.
Now Adam and me used to make a kind of a homemade comedy show for Channel 4 a few years back and we worked very closely together under high pressure circumstances trying to make little films with toys and stuff
And we used to kind of build up a bit of, you know, bubbly anger and fury with each other.
But being, you know, good people, we'd try and repress it, as all human beings do.
Good middle class boys.
Yeah, you just repress it, keep it inside, try and be polite.
But this is what we're getting at.
Eventually, all that repressed fury will bubble up
but caused by something nothing to do with the repressed fury and now we were saying yesterday Adam and I suddenly had a huge argument about which was better the N64 or the PlayStation we were going to put one of these consoles in in one of our links and I insisted it was the N64 Adam thought that was a stupid idea that we'd get more viewers if we if we put that you know the arguments gonna start again
If we put the more popular PlayStation in the link.
I was, yeah, because I was thinking, you know, that we have to maximize the amount of people who are going to be able to get the joke of this link and respond to it.
And it was, it was about the fact that I think the link was something like if you play video games a lot, then you start to dream about them.
no you can if you play video games for a long time then you can actually play them in your mind when you close your eyes without actually having a console and I was saying come on you got to do Tomb Raider man that was the big game at the time Tomb Raider that's a game that you can just imagine you can watch Lara Croft's bottom bouncing around in caves and just
There was like, no way man, it's all about the N64.
Mario Kart, I thought it was all about Mario Kart.
And I was like, no.
But anyway, the point is that years of repressed anger between us bubbled up over the issue of the N64 and the PlayStation.
The argument wasn't about that at all, was it?
No, it was just about how tired and frustrated and in love we were, wasn't it?
And it ended up with us kissing very passionately on the little bed that we had there.
So if you've got a similar story, text 64046, what's the biggest argument you've ever had over the stupidest thing?
We're looking for a real imbalance here, something really pathetic and
an argument that may have turned physical, you know, a spectacular fight over something really retarded.
I've got a couple of examples as well from my home life that I'll tell you in just a second.
But right now here's the Sundays, or maybe just Sundays, I can't quite remember which.
All I remember about Sundays or the Sundays is that the lady has a
beautiful, whiny voice.
And here's a track called Here's Where the Story Ends.
That's the Sundays with Here's Where the Story Ends.
This is Adam and Jo on BBC6 Music.
It's just coming up to half past eight.
Just to remind you, we're in the middle of our Text the Nation feature.
A very important feature.
It's a kind of statistical survey.
It's the nation's favourite feature.
Yeah.
The text number is 64046.
We're looking for the biggest arguments you ever had over the tiniest thing.
Something really trivial that turned into just mushroomed into a way out of control argument really heated and you know, the madder the consequence is the better.
We want to hear exactly what the nature of the argument was and where it went.
I'm going to tell you some stories from my home life.
Yeah.
Uh-oh.
After, after the news and some more music.
Um, because man, you're not going to believe the kind of crazy stuff that goes on in your house.
It goes on in my house.
Also a couple of things that I do that are coming back to me now from our, uh, childhood at school and a few arguments that we had.
Anyway, before that, uh, we have the, uh, national, international and music news read for you by Nicola and Ruth.
Textination!
Text!
Text!
Text!
Textination!
What if I don't want to?
Textination!
But I'm using email.
Is that a problem?
It doesn't matter!
Text!
It's the nation's favorite feature.
And before that, incidentally, you heard the members with Sound of the Suburbs.
Yeah, they were being evocative about what the sound of the suburbs could be during most of the song.
And then at the end, they played a sound of a sort of railway station Tanoi, thereby being very explicit about what the sound of the suburbs is.
That's right.
That was also used as the theme to a wonderful show called Sound of the Suburbs with John Peel.
I remember that show.
And that was a great shot.
I wonder if you can hunt that down online.
I'm sure you can.
Shall I go and try?
Could you try right now?
No.
Oh.
Because we're in the middle of Text the Nation, our exciting survey of the nation's opinions on important issues.
And today, we're asking you what the biggest argument you ever had over the smallest thing was.
And we've had some pretty good examples come in.
Would you like to hear it, Adam?
Yes, please.
Yes, please.
OK.
Uh, Ollie and Exeter has texted.
He says the only time I've ever punched someone in the face was when a friend refused to desist from claiming that Steely Dan a crap.
Punched him in the face for that?
It was on his 21st birthday too.
It's always amazing, isn't it?
Music arguments certainly have the potential to spiral way out of control.
It's happened to me on a number of occasions.
But punching in the face?
That's a bit much.
You'd think a Steely Dan fan would settle the argument with Witten and Wordsmithery, and not resort to face punching.
I'm not sure Fagan and Becker would approve of that kind of behaviour, Olly.
But thanks for admitting it to me anyway.
I had a massive argument one time.
Maybe you were even there, a joke, one time around at Mark's house.
And Dom was there and we got into this conversation about the... These names won't mean much to the listeners.
No, I'm putting it in context with you.
People can relate.
Everyone knows a Mark and a Dom.
Exactly, exactly.
They're people, they're human beings.
We were talking about using music in adverts.
It was around the time that Play by Moby was a big album.
And he was using a lot of the tracks for adverts and stuff and I was telling the whole line about it being a sellout and no, it's no good.
Music cheapens the music, you know.
And Dom was very fervently on the other side and he was like, you're just a music snob.
It doesn't change the music in any way whatsoever.
It doesn't matter.
Still, the music is still there and it's not a problem.
And this argument just went wild.
Way out of control, and it ended up dominating the whole evening.
There were other people around at that point, you know what I mean?
But after a while, all the other conversations fizzled out, and it was just me and Dom facing off about the rights and wrongs of music and adverts.
It was pretty embarrassing.
How embarrassing.
It was embarrassing.
Here's one from Jessica in Cardiff.
The only argument that my boyfriend and I have ever had was just after we moved house, when I discovered that he'd made a unilateral decision to throw away some of those plastic containers that takeaways come in.
I can't remember being so angry ever before or again, and we both ended up crying.
That's brilliant, Jessica.
Isn't it amazing how irrelevant things can take on, you know, an enormous resonance?
I really like that.
So were they collecting them?
Yeah, I guess so.
She had a little collection of them because, you know, this is a sexist generalisation, but ladies like to put things in airtight locks.
They love Tupperware.
Generally, in fact, if there was a contemporary remake of the Clint Eastwood film The Beguiled, it would be to do with women putting a cowboy in an airtight box and sealing it tightly so it was kept fresh.
I'm just extrapolating, but I imagine that's what happened.
Whereas men like to free things.
That's true.
They like to set things free.
They don't like things in boxes.
Yeah, particularly in their manhood.
Yeah, one more quick one.
I tell you what, why don't we go to your breakfast single of the week and then we can hear some more of these in a second.
That's a good idea.
This is my breakfast single of the week.
This is by King Creosote.
This is a lovely single.
It's called You've No Clue Do You.
King Creosote with You've No Clue Do You.
This is Adam and Joe on BBC Six Music.
That's our single of the week.
He's starting a tour from the 12th of September.
You'll be able to see him in Scotland, in Bristol, in Cardiff and Southampton.
And he's fantastic live.
Really brilliant.
His music almost sounds better.
than it does recorded.
Right, he's got the musical chops.
He really has, he's brilliant.
King Krioset there, we'll be playing that again tomorrow.
Now we're in the middle of Text the Nation, the nation's favourite radio feature where we ask you to text in and, you know, take part in kind of a sort of a survey time thing.
You said the way you said the nation's favourite radio feature.
You just tossed it off there like with no irony.
Yeah, like it was real.
Like it was a real fact.
You know, it's because, shall I tell you why?
Come on then.
It's because someone texted in yesterday and said that I sound sarcastic all the time.
Oh, right.
So I've decided to try and occasionally sound a bit sincere.
That's easily done.
I tell you why listeners, sometimes one can sound sarcastic on the radio.
It's nerves, mainly.
It's just trying to think of, like, what are you going to say?
Nerves.
Well, you know what I mean.
I do know what you mean.
It's like not being entirely comfortable because we're not used to doing it.
I do know what you mean.
That's better.
You sound a lot better then.
Yeah, that's a sarcastic noise, isn't it?
A little bit sarcastic.
No.
So here we go.
So this is our text competition.
We're asking you to text in stuff that, uh, arguments that sort of mushroomed out of tiny, trivial, little incidents.
And we've got some good ones here.
Does that sound sincere?
That sounds... Oh, they're really good.
Oh, here's some really good ones.
Now you just sound like a wookie.
No, that's yodel, wait, come on.
Our family have those fridge magnets that are letters, and I've always had a certain phrase spelled out on the fridge using some of these letters.
One time, one time, Lisa, our producer's giggling, I can't concentrate.
One time I saw a letter had been moved to create another phrase, and I asked my brother if he could change it back.
He told me that was silly.
There was no point in having alphabet fridge magnets if he couldn't use them all.
I told him there were plenty of spare letters that he could use.
It escalated into him shouting really loud at me and leaving the kitchen with my dinner uneaten on the table to run upstairs, slam my bedroom door really loud.
That's excellent.
When my mum came up to tell me off, I just got even more annoyed and wouldn't talk to anybody until the next day.
Yeah, boy.
That's brilliant, an all day sulk.
You tell them.
I feel like having an all day sulk.
I haven't had one of those for years.
That's cool.
When I was a kid, my salts would last three or four days.
As an adult.
Yeah, you know sometimes over something major.
Holy moly.
Now, the longest sulk I do is probably 45 minutes.
Right, yeah.
The longest sulk I can recall in the last 10 years was maybe two hours.
And then it just becomes embarrassing after a while.
It's just boring sulking after a bit.
Yeah, yeah.
You don't realise it as a kid but you know it's a bit of a waste of life.
Who was that text from there?
That was from Ash.
That wasn't a text, presumably.
That was an email.
That would have taken ages to text.
Yeah.
Ash, thanks for that.
That was amazing.
Hey, is that lovely Ash who hangs out outside the studio?
Possibly.
We met someone very nice called Ash yesterday.
She's our stalker.
She drew a picture of us.
It was really good.
Here's another one.
This is from Jez in Manchester.
I actually, I hope this isn't true, Jez.
I actually ended up self-harming after a huge and long-lasting row with my wife.
Did you read this before you- Yeah, I did.
Okay.
I'm being brave.
Not wishing to sound like I live in a sitcom, but the argument was about wallpaper.
Not choosing it though, just putting it up.
That was quite sad, but it's all good now.
Hope this helps, Jez in Manchester.
You see, I had to read that out as a service to Jez because he's in treatment.
It doesn't sound much like a sitcom, Jez.
At least, it sounds like a sitcom- Sounds like an Ingmar Bergman film.
Created by Marilyn Manson.
OK, here's another one.
Let's have a more upbeat one.
Here we go.
I had a row with my sister over a black bin liner for sledging, which ended up with me punching her in the nose and she bled in the snow.
You what?
Sounds like a monster.
These are hopefully childhood things, not like fully grown adults.
Yeah.
But that sounds like an epic sort of Citizen Kane-y, traumatic childhood incident.
You know, a sort of Freudian thing that you'll be suffering the after effects of for the rest of your life.
to be, she's going to have a massive grudge against you.
Let's have some more in a second.
Keep texting those 64046 or adamandjo.sixmusic at bbc.co.uk.
Keep them coming in.
It's trail time with exciting Calvin Harris music and more live music, live in the Six Music Hub.
That's lovely, isn't it?
So you bat your lashes, but why would you bat for lashes?
Bat for lashes?
Maybe you have got no eyelashes.
Yeah, and there's a man with some and He's having a competition.
He's saying okay I'm only gonna give these lashes to someone who can really bat their eyes really well Oh because then it'll really pay off I thought it was a cricket competition when you started describing it
really bad for lashes exactly so listen chaps maybe they're all bondage freaks and they're having their bondage people you know who like those bondage people that have those horrible magazines and stuff oh I hate them uh every year they have a cricket match that's right and the winner gets whipped I think that's it it could be that or the other thing is it could be a sort of gothic thing
Right.
Are they still called goths?
You know, the kids that dress up like goths?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Or have they got a special new name?
Anyway, you know, I think they're called Hoobs.
Hoobs?
Maybe the Hoobs who don't have proper eyelashes, they use a tiny bat like a flying creature.
Oh yes.
And they put it onto their eyes.
And the bat flutters its wings.
Yeah, exactly.
And that works in the same way that lashes would do.
There you go.
They use a bat for lashes.
That's that name explained.
That's cleared up that problem.
That was the name of the band, incidentally, lovely Natasha Khan, who is bat for lashes, basically, isn't she?
And that song was called Priscilla.
Now, we've been asking you to text in the biggest rouse and arguments you've ever had over the smallest, most trivial things.
Here's one from Jane in Glasgow.
This is a good one, another music one.
My boyfriend stormed out of the house and broke up with me when I argued that Elvis was more successful than Carl Perkins merely because he was white.
Hmm.
From Jane in Glasgow.
It's a big debate, a big issue, but maybe not big enough to break up a relationship.
I thought Carl Perkins was white as well, though.
That shows how much I know.
Here's another one from Claire in Shepherd's Bush.
My ex and I had an almighty row that ended in us wondering why we were still together, but it started with a tiff over the rationale of the license fee.
That wasn't why we split up, though it would have saved a lot of hassle if it had been.
That's a bit mysterious.
I like it when they... I like it when those kind of arguments start over something.
And your girlfriend for no reason or your wife or whatever,
or your husband, uh, or boyfriend.
Um, seems to, I was just trying to cover all the bases there.
You know, it's a big British castle.
You can't, you've got to be balanced.
Um, but what about inter-species relationships?
Oh, for goodness sake, when you're an alien partner, your animal friend, um, seemingly for no reason just takes the opposing side.
Do you know what I mean?
Now, you know what?
I've taught my lady partner just to say yes.
One of my catchphrases around the house is just agree with me.
What kind of relationship is that?
It's a really good lesson in life.
If someone offers you a point of view, the best way to deal with it is go yes and make a point of it.
Agree with them, go yes, you're right.
But it could also be said that, all you have to do is just agree first, then kind of put your argument, but with a note of I'm not sure whether I'm right or not, it's amazing the difference it makes to your life.
Sure, but the problem with that is that after a while she may just lose the will to live, and she just goes, yes, and stops there.
And then in 20, 30 years time... That's what I'm aiming for.
You're right.
You're right.
But yeah, partners will often take just the opposing side for a mad reason, end up sort of arguing on behalf of something totally outrageous.
Well, this is the whole point of this texting thing, isn't it?
That you're angry for other reasons and then the person puts a point of view and you just decide to take the opposite view, you know, for illogical reasons.
My partner does that, my life partner, who I'm married to.
Harry.
Harry.
And she, I call her Harry, and she basically, like sometimes I just like get completely furious and just say, you don't really believe what you're arguing about, do you?
We had this massive row one time about the concept of Britishness, right?
Like, is there such a thing as Britishness?
What would you say to that?
I'd say you're boring.
obviously i'm boring that's a given i'm watching telly but with the with that in mind would you say there was such a thing as as typical things that are british and to everyone yes i'd agree yes you see here's my here you see i'm now going to put my advice into practice yes i think that's seriously engage me on this just just because otherwise all right well my theory will
Yes, there were they were things that were quintessentially British here at the rest of the world like cliches of Britishness things like that Harry disagreed Big Ben and And Grenadier Guardsmen and red phone boxes and stuff.
My partner wasn't having any of it She said no, there's no such thing.
What are you talking about?
No one thinks those things are typically British and I just sort of it was just a logic block, you know and ended it up
A massive round, it was a nightmare.
Do you want to chat to me about it during the news?
I'd love to.
Okay, before that, here's the Kaiser Chiefs.
Oh, ain't that nice?
It is nice, but why is it necessary to have that slight sort of freak out there in the last 30 seconds?
It's just filling time.
Well, it sounds as if they're trying to have their cake and eat it, you know, to re-establish their indie credentials, almost as if they're ashamed of the summery...
tune fest that they've created their breaks I'm talking about with their single beatific visions which is a lovely song but I'm just questioning their wisdom of having a little free section there um I'm gonna change the subject go on then we're in the middle of our text competition uh text the nation it's not a competition oh no I'm gonna be
You're going to be all killed.
I'm going to be excluded.
But we're asking you what the biggest arguments you've ever had over the stupidest, smallest things are.
And we've got some good emails.
Can I read you some, please?
Yes, please.
Morning, chaps.
This is from Chris at Work in London.
The worst argument I can remember was over whether trivial pursuit is any good.
Me and a couple of friends were playing Dungeons and Dragons when the subject of trivial pursuit came up.
Nerds.
I love nerds.
I offered the opinion that Triv's was a great game, while my friend said it was rubbish.
The argument escalated to the point where I, as Dungeon Master, ripped up his character sheet, thereby killing his character.
He burst into tears.
I'm quite sure he did.
Wow, that's like tearing up his soul.
How old were you?
I'd love to know how old you were.
At the time, we were 38.
A lot of arguments start over Trivial Pursuit, don't they?
It's a very divisive game.
Yeah, because sometimes the questions are slightly badly worded.
You know, there's an element of ambiguity in the question.
That's true.
And you try and, you know, claim your rights, you know, that you're clever and the people that made the game are.
And also oftentimes it can seem like the other team is getting a run of easy questions.
And, you know, like the other team will get like, who is the lead singer of the band?
I know it seems unjust.
That's absolutely right.
And then and you'll get like, who invented quantum
We could almost do a whole other text the nation on board game arguments.
Here's one from David Cardiff.
Probably the most pointless argument I had was a few years ago working in an office with workmate Billy.
Oh workmate Billy.
On the radio in the background was the classic Down Under by Men at Work.
Quoting one of the lines, I asked Billy if he'd ever tried a Vegemite sandwich.
He said I was talking rubbish and the line was a bit of my sandwich.
It flared up into a huge argument with me trying to explain that Vegemite was the Oz equivalent to Marmite, but he wasn't having any of it.
Workmate Billy, what are you thinking?
We didn't speak for three days.
To this day, he still thinks I'm talking rubbish.
Man, Workmate Billy, you know you can go on the internet.
Workmate Billy, is he like a doll?
Yeah, there's a kids TV photograph.
Workmate.
The Kids TV program and it features an ignorant man who refuses to check facts about the lyrics of Men at Work songs by using the internet.
Of course it's a Vegemite sandwich workmate Billy, I'm with you on that one.
What was his name?
Uh, his name was Dave.
Dave, thanks Dave.
Hi Adam and Joe, I had a fight with a schoolmate over Tiswas versus Swap Shop.
Ooh, yeah.
Basically, he punched me in the face and knocked a tooth out.
Man, he knocked a tooth out!
I'm pleased to say I was sticking up for Tiswas and was therefore correct.
That's from Alan Manager.
Well, that's the... No, manger.
Manger, manger.
And he was on the side of Tiswas.
That was a big, divisive thing.
ITV versus the BBC back in those days.
It was very much posh boys versus the ruffians, wasn't it?
Yes.
Well, Tiswas was an exception to that rule, I'd say.
Why?
Tiswas was kind of a rough program, wasn't it?
Yeah, but it was also strangely sophisticated.
Oh, it was sophisticated?
I'm not saying it was for your own.
I- I- Personally, I used to- I- I could never- Well, Tiswas was on late, though.
Oh, no, that's- that's- that was- OTT was on late.
Yeah, yeah, they're the spin-off.
Okay, here's one more.
This is quite involved.
Are you ready?
You've got to concentrate to follow this one.
This is from Martin.
Okay.
Foolishly, I thought I was in with them and started what I considered to be a light-hearted row with the chaps.
I questioned the artistic integrity of said film and its starce alone.
What a load of lowbrow tripe, I said.
To which one of the fellows replied, it's a brilliant film.
Stallone makes loads of money.
My response was, well, what about Joy Division?
Not much money, but great art.
One of the group then queried Joy Division, or film machine then, to which I unwisely uttered, I rest my case, before strolling confidently home.
Okay, fade to black.
Couple of days later, fade up.
Couple of days later, I saw one of these men across the road and I waved jauntily at him.
He merely made a fist and slapped it into his opposite palm.
On my return to the pub, I was followed into the toilet by the fellows and threatened and made to apologize.
The inn's chef saved me from further damage.
I was humbled.
It was a daft row and it taught me some serious lessons about pub banter.
Who's that from?
That's from Martin, Martin Cole.
Martin.
I love that's like a sort of Beno strip.
I love that like a thug punching his fist into his palm like that.
Does that sort of thing really happen?
Oi!
That's like a landlord shaking his fist.
Yeah.
At you.
I like Joy Division.
What film was she in?
That's very good, Martin.
And then I messed my case.
Right now, Joe, it's time for your free choice.
Yeah.
Keep those texts coming in, by the way.
64046 or AdamandJoe.6musicatbbc.co.uk.
It's time for a sort of a free play.
This is Iros Childs, former lead singer of Gorky's Igotic Monkey.
This is called Costa Rita.
That was Lovely Song there you picked for us, Joe.
That was Lovely Song.
That was Lovely Song.
That's from Iros's album Chops, the one before, the one before the last, even though the new one isn't quite out yet.
It was his first solo album, Chops, I think.
Yeah, and it's got a marvellous cover, which is a sort of beautiful image made up of pork chops.
Yeah, the new one is called Miracle Inn, I think it's out this month.
If you like the sound of that, you could pretty confidently just go out and buy both of Iros's albums.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And everyone's a winner.
Everyone's a winner, baby.
That's the truth.
Making love to you just sits me free.
Does it?
Yes.
Well, it's a thrill though, that's the word, isn't it?
Now, we were talking about
arguments, ladies and gentlemen, in Text the Nation today, arguments that are started fairly innocuous and then spiralled way out of control.
You know what a good example for the sort of science of arguments is?
Not that anyone's watched it this year because it's rubbish, but Big Brother, in years past, used to be a sort of, you know, a genuine social experiment and it used to be quite fascinating to watch how
you know, repressed anger or frustration with someone else's character would pop up over a tiny little thing.
For me, that was one of the most fascinating things about that programme.
Well, that's true.
When it used to be good.
Last year, the celebrity big brother with, you know, George Galloway and Pete Burns and Sean Tell and Preston.
Now was that last year?
Yeah, it was beginning of last year.
Yeah, it was because the controversial one was this year.
Yeah.
It was amazing.
The arguments that blew up in that house when all those lunatics were in there were Shakespearean.
It was extraordinary and I taped all those shows obsessively and one day I'm going to watch them back.
You could pretty much transcribe them and you'd have like an amazing play but the stuff they argued about there was demented and it was mainly Michael Barrymore's fault as I recall.
Here's one that's coming from Matt.
He says, my best friend from 5 to 16 stormed out and never spoke to me again after I fast-forwarded through the sofa gag on the Simpsons episode he'd come round to watch.
No, come on.
That can't be real.
That's not true.
No one's that obsessed with the Simpsons.
If that's really the case, then you are thick.
No, well, the friend, if that's really the case, then, you know, who would want a friend who would sacrifice their relationship with you because of a Simpson's sofa gag?
That's what I mean.
You know what I mean?
It's insane.
It's insane behavior.
You're well short of that guy.
Here's another email that's come in, and this actually sounds like a serious marital rift that is happening in the life of Sasha Darok Davies.
Are you ready for this one?
Go on then.
Saturday just gone.
My girlfriend and I had 20 odd people over for a Barbie.
Just weird people.
Yeah.
Before our guest's arrival, I was preparing the last of the food.
A basil oil.
What?
A basil oil to brush skewers with.
Nice.
Yeah.
Anyway, the Mrs. wanted to weed the flower beds, but wanted me to remove the cat pops first.
There were some cat pops in there.
That seems a little unfair, yeah.
I didn't want to get cat poppy hands.
He's not using the word pop here.
I'm cleaning it up for broadcast.
I did not want to get cat poppy hands and then return to the food preparation.
So I said, I'll do it in a minute, love.
Reasonable.
Then she started on about my food snobbery.
Who cares about the food?
Who are you trying to impress?
et cetera, et cetera.
I said, whoa, what?
So you're too precious to clean up cat pops.
She went mad and threw all manner of kitchen utensils at me.
To which I responded, now this is where I think you step over the line, Sasha Darok Davies.
This is took to which I responded with loud playground like woo.
Now that sound, the woo.
Whose is like a sort of international siren of things getting fired?
Escalation.
Isn't it?
It's the argument.
Because you're taking things to the level of a five-year-old.
Five-year-olds can't communicate.
They just physically brutalise each other, right?
But you know, the sad thing is that sometimes the siren is employed to try and defuse the situation.
Oh, but it never does.
It never does, does it?
Because it's the worst possible thing you can do.
After all, after all two hand objects had bounced off my head, she attacked, exclamation mark, and punched me in the side of my head.
It hurt!
She's only five foot one!
That's harsh, man.
That's the end.
Sasha Darok Davis works for the Bear Film Company in London.
Your life is being lived at a high octane level there, Sasha.
Can you just tell us if you're still together just so we don't worry about you?
I hope everything's all right there in the... Now, Dr. Cornish says that in order to defuse that argument, what should you have done?
At what point did it start to... Pick up the cat pops.
I tell you what you should have done.
You should have popped five or six cat pops on a skewer.
Brush them with a little bit of garlic oil and shut them in your wife's mouth!
But I would have done.
Thanks, Dr Cornish.
Uh, music time now.
Here's a classic from the Kinks.
Yes!
Yes!
That's the Kinks with Autumn Armanack now.
Damon Olbarn must have loved that track as a youth, you know?
Because that's pretty much the template for All Blur.
Would you say?
Around the park life period.
That's from 1967.
And an amazing song it is too.
And I'm not putting down Blur or Olbarn for liking that track and slavishly adhering to its rules therein.
because it's a, it's a smash.
Uh, now we are talking about in text the nation today, arguments that have spiraled out of control.
Uh, then it started very trivially and someone mentioned before, Triv's trivial pursuit and the kind of arguments that that can cause.
And of course, there are many games that provoke terrible arguments.
Scrabble is one of them.
And you must have had it.
You're a bit of a Scrabble fiend.
I'm a bit of a Scrabble fiend, but you know, I've got something called a Scrabble dictionary.
Right.
Which you have to have to hand, and it's got all the words without the boring definitions.
Okay, so you adhere, you just stick to what, if it's not in the Scrabble dictionary, you can't have it.
Well, the rules are, if, wait, games like this, you've got to agree on the rules before you start playing, that's the key thing, isn't it?
And I think the rules in Scrabble go that if a word is contested, then you go to the dictionary,
Uh, yeah.
Is that it?
And then if it... What happens if it's wrong?
Do you lose a go?
Mm-hmm.
You retract the tiles and lose a go.
Ooh.
Or do you play again?
I'm not sure.
I'm not that serious a Scrabble player.
You're quite serious though, aren't you?
Well, I'll confess something.
We used to play a version where you're allowed to look in the dictionary.
Right.
Yeah.
because it was more fun that way.
Well, you can look it up before you lay the tiles down.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Because you used to get incredible scores and learn new words.
It was fun.
I suppose.
Well, there was one time on holiday, I wasn't actually there for this, but my friend told me all about it.
I was there.
Were you there?
Yeah.
For this big Scrabble game.
Well, keep telling the story.
This is the quick-chuck one.
Yeah, yeah.
Were you really there?
Yeah.
So, my friend's dad... Well, maybe you should tell it then.
Well, it was a very posh holiday at a lovely house in Corfu and a friend of ours' father, who is quite an important man.
We were playing Scrabble with him and he played the word... No, somebody played the word...
Quit.
Was it quit?
I think it was quit.
Q-U-I-T and the friend's imperious father put down J-U-T on the end of quit.
To make quit jut.
Quit jut.
We went hang on a second.
We're only about 17 or 18.
We went hang on.
Quit jut?
Wait, is that a word?
Of course it's a word.
Quit jut.
Quit jut.
And then he followed it up with bip.
He played Pip later.
We said, what does quit quit jump mean?
Well, it's a part of a ship.
Is it part of a ship?
He got furious about it.
And he was furious because three little straplings had badly thuffed him out.
We had started taking the Mickey and dads don't like having a Mickey taken out by kids today.
He got really angry and he only made it worse by playing Bip.
Bip is one of my favorite words now.
Is it news time?
Here is the news read by Nicola and Ruth.
There we go, that's Toots and the Maples with pressure drop.
Maybe he was driving and he lost some pressure in one of his tyres.
Yeah, or he just went over a hill and he got that strange fluffy feeling in his stomach.
Or maybe he's had his blood pressure checked.
There's been a slight drop and he should eat more of that, spread what Carol Vordman does.
Better call.
What she makes.
It's made from breast milk, is it?
Is that wrong to say that?
Yes, it is, in every conceivable way.
I just heard that.
Recently, on the street.
That's the word on the street.
After an episode of Countdown, she's milked.
Okay.
Now, it's band aid time this week, folks.
We have inherited this feature from the wonderful Sean Kievny.
Usually, Sean will ask people to vote for a couple of people to vote for a band that they think should be heard on 6 Music.
This time, we have a couple of amazingly exciting young artists that Joe and I are pitting against each other.
Yeah.
Which is artist number one, Joe Cornish.
Artist number one is an artist called Joe Cornish, who's produced a kind of a Euro, what is it, Euro house sort of a track called European Supermarket, and it's a kind of Kraftwerk
stroke pet shop boys style exploration into into what it's like to go shopping in a supermarket when you're on holiday in your sort of urban electronica urban electronica yes so so here's it here's a brief snatch of that
There we go.
That's cool.
European supermarket.
The full version is one minute, 58 seconds long.
If you want to hear the whole thing, then log on to bbc.co.uk forward slash six music and you'll navigate your way.
Click on our stupid faces and eventually you'll find a thing where you can vote for either that track or its competitor.
Tell us about its competitor, Adam.
It's competitor is by an artist called Adam Buxton.
He's from London.
Not a name I've heard.
No, well, he's a new artist.
He's an exciting new artist.
On the scene.
On the scene, a Jack White from the White Stripes is a big fan.
Really?
Yeah, and didn't produce this song, but wanted to.
Really?
Yeah.
And the track is called Jane's Brain.
And Buxton says that it was created after thinking about a girl called Jane and imagining what it would be like if she had a brain.
If she had a brain.
Yeah.
And all the things she would... No, she does have a brain.
But imagining about the... Just, you know, thinking about the things that her brain might do.
And that's where the song came from.
Let's hear a clip of it.
I've had a small heart attack.
It's got a minor stroke.
That's really good.
It's a rock song.
So you just, listener, if you care to, if you log on to www.bbc.co.uk forward slash 6music forward slash shows forward slash sean underscore keveny forward slash bandaidal1.shml that will take you directly to the voting site.
Alternatively you can just go to www.bbc.co.uk
and just work it out.
It's an important thing, though.
Can they hear the whole song on there?
No, you can only hear a small snatch.
That's the whole point of the thing.
If you could hear the whole song, there would be no point!
Yeah, and because we play the winner, at the end of the week, it's very important that anybody listening, anybody who cares, does that and clicks one of those things.
Because, you know, it ticks all the big British Castle boxes.
It's interactive.
It's new music, uh, and it's just fun.
Now, Album of the Day.
Album of the Day is, uh, Super Furry Animal's new, um, long player, and here's a track called Runaway.
Check it out!
It's got a sexy voice, that man, doesn't it?
Uh, Inside Sport with Gabby Logan.
Can you imagine what's Inside Sport, Joe?
Yeah, app- apparently, absolutely nothing.
just there completely empty it's a void so before that you heard a track from the album of the day that was super furry animals with hay venus no with runaway the new album is called hay venus released yesterday yeah and it's their first for the rough trade label they've switched labels apparently
and you can hear more tracks from that album all day here on BBC six music now we were telling you earlier that you can vote for our band-aid feature two tracks by new artists you have to vote for the one you want to hear you go to the BBC six music website click listen to the samples click on the one you like best you can also leave a comment there
Can you?
Yeah, you can leave a little message.
Jason from West Yorkshire has left a message.
He says, both tracks are as good as each other.
Honestly, they are.
So I made my choice by having a cough war with myself.
I coughed twice and the noise which startled my cat more won.
It was my joke-off which proved louder and more startling to Otis, which is his cat.
Dear, oh dear.
That's not... I mean, what's that?
That's a message.
Is that the way you vote as well?
What's his name?
His name is Jason.
I like the sound of Jason.
Jason?
I think he sounds like a good guy.
In the polling booth, both parties have things to recommend them, so I'm going to have a little cough game and put my vote in the Tory box because... That's how all national decisions should be made, by with coughing and the way cats respond to them.
Fair enough.
Cats are very wise.
Now, all Egyptians worship them.
I'm going to carry on talking.
Are there other cat facts?
Come on, come up with three cat facts.
They like to eat meat.
Right.
Uh, feminism is based on ancient cat history.
According to Jermaine Greer.
Uh, and my cat's called Maisie.
Maisie, yeah.
Three cat facts there from Joe Cornish.
Now here's the yayayays with maps.
That's good stuff, isn't it?
That's yayayays with maps.
This is Adam and Joe here on...
BBC six music ring for Sean Keating just a quick technical Problem that might have happened with the band-aid website voting thing.
Oh, yeah Thanks from Daniel from Durham who sent us a very nice email saying that both links play the same song by having that investigated by BBC technical monkeys If that is the case, there will be an execution outside the big British castle And someone will be beheaded by who runs the BBC Mark Thompson
Well, Michael Jackson, the pop star.
Michael Jackson, the disgraced pop star, will be beheading a BBC monkey outside the big British castle, so all big British peasants can come and throw fruit at them.
The rotten martyrs.
Yes.
Also, a little bit of house cleaning from earlier on.
Tell us a bit of controversy about the pronunciation of Eros Childs' name.
Yeah, you see, I read a thing.
We know Eros, well, we kind of used to.
pretend we did, because we filmed the segment with them and we were kind of in love with the gawky psychotic monkey.
And so we pretend we know him.
And we used to know how to pronounce his name, right?
Yeah, well, they sort of said, we started off saying, is it Uros?
It's spelt E-U-R-O-S.
I guess Welsh listeners can give us the definitive answer to this.
But he's such a sweet guy.
He never, if you pronounce it wrongly, he never gets angry.
He doesn't really mind.
And one of the other band members said, it's more like Eiros.
And so we did that, but then we went a little too far.
How did you pronounce it just then?
Well, I've been wavering.
I kind of forgot how to pronounce it again.
And there was a profile of him in one of the papers on the weekend.
And it said in brackets, pronounced I-R-O-S, E-Y-E dash R-O-S, I-R-O-S.
So I've been thinking, right, good.
That's the definitive answer.
I'll pronounce it I-R-O-S.
That's what I've been doing.
But then,
someone texted in and said that we were doing it wrong.
You shouldn't and the thing is at the BBC bad pronunciation is grounds for torture.
It cannot be tolerated and not in CBBC if you work for the children's castle, the bouncy castle behind the main castle then the worse your pronunciation is the more likely you are to rise to the top.
Yeah, but here in the old, big British castle, owned by the National Trust, we have to cross our T's and dot our P's.
Exactly.
Now it's time for my free choice.
This is a track from Travis's latest album, which is called The Boy With No Name, I think, and I love this song, and it's very sort of winsome and sweet.
I guess that's what Travis are like, aren't they?
Love them or hate them, I personally love them, and this is called Sailing Away.
Oh, I'd like to go on a canal boat holiday and play that.
I love that song.
That's Travis from their album, The Boy With No Name.
This is Adam and Jo on BBC Six Music.
That's pretty much it for our show today.
Just before we leave, I'd like to say thank you very much indeed to everyone who texted us and emailed us.
Fantastic tea... tea, tea, tea... Oh, I can't be wrong.
Fantastic teats.
Teats.
You've got fantastic teats.
Look at them.
Hey, that's a polite way of saying a rude word we just discovered.
We can run with that.
Just before we leave as well, I've been fascinated... She had beautiful teeth.
We have, I'm going to gloss over that, the TV on in the corner here in the studio, and I've been fascinated by Kate Garraway's hair.
She presents GMTV, and I want you, tomorrow morning folks, to check out her hair and then talk to me about it, because there's something insane going on there.
Yeah, hair, yeah.
That's it from us today.
Thank you very much for listening.
We'll be back between 7 and 10 tomorrow morning.
Coming up, Anita Rani with Calvin Harris live in the Hub.
So stay tuned.
This is Crumble by Dinosaur Jr.
We'll see you tomorrow.
Bye!
Cheerio!