That was Suede with Filmstar.
Good morning, this is Adam and Joe here on BBC 6 Music on a Friday morning.
It's apparently gonna be a fantastically beautiful sunny weekend.
That's right.
Although, I was talking to a friend of mine yesterday and he was saying, what if it's just a government?
conspiracy, the whole weather forecast thing.
They tell you it's going to be sunny, to keep you down, to stop you complaining, to cheer you up, and then it doesn't materialise.
Because the last couple of days, they said yesterday was going to be decent, the government.
Well, it was everywhere but London.
Was it?
Yeah.
That's what I'm saying.
Local London government.
Do you think?
They're trying.
I will find out.
This weekend will be proof, and on Monday we'll know whether we're all victims of a shadow weather conspiracy.
Yeah, exactly.
a shadowy weather conspiracy welcome to the show we've got a terrific show lined up for you listeners we've got great music this hour some della soul coming up um some calvin harris that lovely edwin collins track i'm looking forward to that fantastic we're also we're also going to be talking about
you know, kind of friend networks, MySpace, Facebook, type places, Twitter, what's the other one?
Bebo?
Bebo.
And thinking about maybe what's next for the friend networking online phenomenon.
And also we have text donation in the second hour of our program here today.
Our amazing feature with its own jingle that we created specially just this week for the feature.
Yeah, in fact, we'll be serving up a delicious hot waffle for you all morning for breakfast.
High quality, delicious waffle with some inane sauce drizzled over the top.
Let's have some music now, though.
This is the Kaiser Chiefs with the Angry Mob.
So they're the Angry Mob.
Who read the papers every day?
Yeah, it's just the Kaiser Chiefs.
Is it?
Yeah, they like who they like, they hate who they hate, and they like to buy... The papers?
The papers every day.
Yeah, they didn't read all the papers every day, maybe they wouldn't be so angry.
Maybe they'd chill out, you know?
Yeah, exactly.
You know, exactly.
So, uh, I had an alarming incident yesterday.
Did you?
Listeners, Adam.
Yeah, what happened?
I tried to log onto my MySpace page.
Right.
www.myspace.com forward slash Joe Cornish.
For the first time in about a month, I imagine you tried to log on there.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And it had been varisified.
Viralized.
Hacker doodled.
Why?
I don't know, but I couldn't log in.
And then my email inbox started to fill up with messages from my spurious Myspace friends, saying that I was offering them a deal on back-to-school trousers.
Oh, really?
They were complaining because they'd been getting weird spam from you.
They were either complaining that I was, yeah, offering them back-to-school trouser offers or that they tried to buy the back-to-school trousers and hadn't had any luck and the discount wasn't what I was promising them.
I suddenly found myself sucked into a school trouser selling kind of confusion.
School trousers?
And there was no sort of sexy aspect to this, was there?
What, you mean a sort of dirty one?
Yeah, cos usually... No, no, no, no.
It was purely a money-off clothing offer.
That's unusual.
It is unusual, isn't it?
Yeah, cos usually with the net, anything spam-spam style... Yeah.
..is either purely financial, like, please give us your bank details.
Honestly, we're from your bank.
Look, we've printed the logo of your bank in the corner of this piece of spam.
Usually the Royal Bank of Scotland.
All of them do it.
All of them.
Barclays, Bank of Scotland, NatWest, anyone will do it.
They'll stick the logo in the corner there and ask you to get in touch.
I don't have an account with the Royal Bank of Scotland, but they daily try and get my details from me.
A couple of times I've been tempted to follow the link.
I've put your details in.
Just in case there's some money waiting for you.
Well, I don't want to, you know, they're carrying out emergency checks and my PIN number's been used.
They need to check the security.
They need my details.
Oh, I'd better give them...
Anyway, do you want to hear the end of my story, my MySpace story?
I changed my password, put up an apology, and that's the end.
Is it?
Yeah.
You changed your password, so no more spam hacky.
So it's very easy to find the passwords of these things.
My brother, who's an IT guy, was telling me that with...
Wi-Fi as well.
It's very easy to hack people's passwords You know what I mean?
If you go and there was a story in the paper yesterday about a bloke who got arrested for using Some random guy's Wi-Fi standing outside his house The cops saw him with his laptop and he was tapping away on his laptop sat on the wall of some blokes house They arrested him for you illegally using somebody else's Wi-Fi he'd hacked into their passwords
It's a can of electronic worms.
And he's looking at six months.
This guy, or a hefty fine.
So, you know, don't do any of that.
Just don't.
Just whatever you're thinking of doing today, don't.
Put it down.
Here's Dela Soul with Say No Go.
Dela Soul.
That sounds great, doesn't it?
It's wonderful stuff.
Still one of the all-time great hip-hop albums.
How many years later?
89.99.
Two thousand and nine, almost 20 years later.
It's amazing.
18 years later.
But it was never a particularly well-produced album.
What are you talking about?
I'm talking about the fact that it sounded as if it was recorded in a bucket much of it And you know because they made it all themselves in their bedrooms.
Yeah, but but on those terms it was incredibly well produced Well, I know what you mean.
It doesn't sort of sound expansive
It's not beefy.
And it doesn't have all the knob twiddling going on.
Yeah, it's not beefy.
That's true in the way modern hip-hop happens on.
But in terms of the technical achievement... Yes, absolutely.
It's extraordinary and it was revolutionary.
And kids, if you haven't got that album, you can buy it for about £4 now, I think.
Three, probably.
You're mad.
You should go and buy it today.
Whatever sort of music you like.
Exactly.
Everyone should own Three Feet High and Rising.
By De La Soul.
And it's actually got some semi-amusing talking bits in between their tracks.
Yeah, one of the first hip-hop albums to feature skits, which since became one of the most annoying features of hip-hop albums.
In fact, there's a kind of a phoning to be done on the worst possible skit on a hip-hop album.
But those were pretty good ones even though even they get quite tiresome after a few listens Yeah, yeah, and it's certainly not something you want to stick on a compilation I would think but you can skip the skip the skits skits.
Yeah couldn't quite get my mouth around that this early in the morning Now we're talking about myspace and You know that kind of thing well myspace particularly Joe's very keen to boost his myspace friend percentage yes and
He's almost at a thousand, folks.
Yeah, come on.
Do you want to be friends with Joe Cornish?
Log on to... There's very little to it.
Well, you can find him.
What do you do when you log on to... I find Myspace quite annoying.
And I'm thinking of shutting down my... You've got on Myspace as well, haven't you?
My account.
Well, I was told...
by an agent.
She said, because I was going to go over to America, the land of Coca-Cola and golden nuggets.
And I was going to go over to America.
And she said, listen, you need a MySpace account because people, you know, in America, they need to see the stuff you're doing.
You can post some of your videos there.
And it's easy for the agents just to log on to your MySpace page.
And I said, well, I've got a blog.
She said, no, it's not the same.
I said, well, it truly is the same.
You just type in the address of my blog, and then you can see all my videos there.
No, they like MySpace right now.
So you need a MySpace page.
I bet she's not saying that anymore.
No.
Because, in fact, MySpace is kind of over, isn't it?
You would think so.
It's all about Facebook.
How many, because you can only deal with one of these things at a time.
Like who, what Facebook freak, like Edgar Wright, your friend, our friend, is a, he used to be a MySpace
He does both now.
Does he do both?
Does he maintain them and turn them?
What we're trying to think about here, listeners, is what's going to happen next in the world of electronic networking.
The innovation that Facebook brought to the table was that even if you weren't on it, you'd receive an email from a friend who was, and with one click, suddenly you'd have a profile.
Right?
Yeah.
Facebook is kind of invasive.
YouTube does send you messages.
It's as if Facebook has a profile for you even though you don't know it.
Right.
And people are talking about you and inviting you and poking you.
It's like there's a party happening and someone's had a party in your name, in their house.
Hey, there's a Joe Cornish party going on.
Come along, Joe Cornish.
What?
Okay then.
It's that kind of thing.
I don't understand though.
I got sucked into- I don't care about Facebook, but yet I'm still on it.
You get sucked into it like an evil electronic tendril wrapping itself around your ankle.
But does Edgar do both of his pages?
Does he maintain them the whole time?
You don't have to really maintain Facebook, do you?
You just have to respond.
You do kind of have to.
Some people maintain it.
Some people spend ages on it.
Yeah, he does both.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But what's the next one going to be?
What's going to supersede Facebook?
If you've got any thoughts on this, text us on 64046.
You can email us at AdamandJoe.6musicatbbc.co.uk.
The guy that invented Facebook is 23.
He's a billionaire.
So there's someone out there who's going to have the next little tiny little incremental progressive idea to push this technology forward.
It could be you listening at home.
It could be you.
Text us in your ideas for the next step that interactive electronic websites should take.
And hey, we can share some of the money.
Chumbucket.
What?
That would be the next... That's your name.
That's the name.
Next site.
That's true.
We've got to start with a name.
Bebo.
Facebook.
It's got to be a kind of catchy name.
Yakbag.
Should we have some more music while we think?
Yeah, absolutely.
This is Emma Pollock with Acid Test.
Hey, this is Adam and Joe here on 6 Music.
We're filling in for Sean Kievny.
He's a wafer.
One more week... He's in Tuscany.
After this, in Tuscany.
Yeah, imagine.
Having a nice Tuscany time.
Tuscany Raiders.
And yeah, dealing with the Sam people.
Is that what the Tuscany American football team are called?
The Tuscany Raiders.
The Tuscany Raiders, and they're all Star Wars themed, do you think?
That's where Sam people come from.
If they're not, they're missing a trick.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So we were just talking about the kind of friends networking phenomenon that continues to reinvent itself online and wondering what would be next for the world of MySpaces and Facebooks and things like that.
We were thinking some kind of site where people post Skurril an innuendo about you, right?
Yeah, using that Facebook mechanism of receiving an email
Which kind of tantalizingly suggests that people are talking about you in another room You receive an email from this website.
What's it called this website?
Well, we had a couple of names.
We thought maybe Jerk circle slagbucket.
So you receive an email it says Someone has slagged you off on slagbucket.
Yeah, or you're a jerk find out why
on Jerk Circle.
been said about
very, very bad contratons on the internet.
It's a disaster area.
So, you know, carry on thinking, folks.
Give us some of your ideas for directions that these places could go in.
Yeah, what's the next step?
What's the next multi-billion pound website that'll convince us all to join it?
We could all get rich off this, you know.
Now, it's time for my session track.
This is a Peel session from 2001, and it's the White Stripes, one of John Peel's favourite bands, and they're playing a track here called La Fayette Blues.
Enjoy!
Yeah, good morning.
Hope you're feeling all happy and perky this morning, ready for the amazing weekend that's coming up, the Big Bang holiday, three days of pure enjoyment.
And sunshine.
We've been promised sunshine.
Yeah, is this going to be sunshine here in London?
As I keep saying, Adam, it has been sunny in the rest of the country.
That's what you say.
But we're broadcasting nationally now.
It's important to embrace the rest of the country.
It has not been too London-centric.
It has been sunny like in a couple of places, but generally the weather has not been great in the UK over the last week.
But it is going to be an amazing weekend.
And the best thing is, you got Monday off.
So imagine what Sunday nights are going to be like.
Yeah.
It's going to be a crazy party.
Everyone's going to be naked, drunk, throwing their own doings at the wall.
That's my kind of party.
It's going to be incredible.
The house is going to be messed up.
The car's going to be driven through the neighbor's front room.
People won't wash.
People won't wash.
No, there'll be tents on the roof.
Slates missing.
Sink pulled out of the thing.
Yeah.
rude words written in lipstick on your mum's bum it's gonna be off the hook man that's you've described my ideal part Sunday night yeah yes and my what oh yeah absolutely can't wait the mum's bum thing that you like most now I'm thinking of what I'm gonna write
Because there's enough room there to write quite a bit.
Poor old mum.
Poor old mum.
So listen, we've been discussing what the next step forward will be in the internet social website networking phenomenon.
That's the correct phrase, isn't it?
Yes.
Internet social networking phenomenon, the INFP.
Um, um, we had the idea for, uh, what was it called?
Uh, slag buckets.
Jerk circle, or slag bucket, or slag bag.
Yeah, where you receive a provocative email in your inbox, uh, informing you that people you don't know or slightly know are talking about you in a malicious way on a website that you then feel compelled to log onto and join.
Yeah.
Cause who wouldn't?
Here's another idea I've had, uh,
CGI technology, virtual paintings, have taken massive steps forward.
It's easy to do.
A toddler can do it now.
In fact, toddlers made Shrek 3.
Right.
Wrote it and made it.
They were even stupid toddlers.
Really?
I believe so.
They were subnormally intelligent.
But anyway, it's so easy now that I think a good idea would be to start a website where people who aren't you, but that know you, make a naked you.
Right.
They're called Frankenstein's on the internet.
Yeah.
An avatar of you has been created on yourbits.com.
Right.
So somewhere there's a naked picture of you with all your details, all your circles, triangles and tubes on display.
All the geometric shapes laid out for all to see you couldn't not click on that So this is actually this is not the same as a Frankenstein because the Frankenstein is just your face Grafted onto somebody else's body, but you're constructing a a nudie from scratch.
Yeah, right, right
Yeah, telling all.
Yeah, so they've taken pictures of you.
No, no, they haven't.
It's imaginary.
No, but listen, they've taken pictures of you and they've sort of constructed from, with a CGI model, what you would look like without clothes.
Exactly.
Right.
So it's sort of realistic.
Yeah, oh no, it's photorealistic, and they've posed you in a revealing pose.
Yeah.
Maybe with a celebrity or something.
Now, how could you not click onto that?
And the thing is, to access that picture, you've got to put in your details.
You've got to log in.
Deets.
And that's the key with something like Facebook.
You log in to see what people have said about you, and that's it.
You're hooked.
You're hooked.
You're in the web.
Yeah.
So both of those are brilliant ideas.
What would you call that one?
I think it's an agree listener's.
Bitbox.
Bit torrent.
Bit torrent.
Yeah, something like that.
If you've got ideas, listeners, please text us in.
64046.
Obviously we're getting hundreds of texts, but it would be true to say that between 7 and 8 in the morning, when our listenership are a bit groggy, we don't get as many texts as we do later in the show.
So yours is almost guaranteed to be read out.
But if I'm making it sound like we're not getting any, that's wrong.
Because we're getting millions.
Millions.
Music now.
This is Arcade Fire with Neighbourhood Number Two.
There you go.
There's something else to look forward to on Bank Holiday Monday, Harry Hill's show.
That's sure to be great.
It'll be fantastic.
Sodom and Joe on BBC Six Music.
It's quarter to eight in the morning.
And it's Friday.
So you know, you just got to get through today.
Then it's fun time.
Crackerjack.
Crackerjack time.
Yeah.
Exactly.
No excuse to be miserable today.
No, exactly.
If you're miserable today, then I hate you.
That's a bit much.
What if something terrible's happened?
No, I went too far.
Yeah.
OK, it's time for my session track.
And this morning, here's some associates.
This is from John Peel, a Radio 1 session on the 28th of April 1981.
What were you doing on the 28th of April 1981, Adam?
You know, you've actually got diaries, haven't you, Adam Buxton?
Yeah, but not from the... Well, I was from 1981.
Not from 1981?
writing something.
My diaries are a little bit erratic.
Around then I was writing a story on a roll of lavatory paper.
Were you really?
Yeah, on a pink roll.
Is that what he did?
Yeah, he wrote his erotic doings on a toilet roll in prison during the French Revolution.
There you go.
There you go, fat fans.
Well, I was doing something very similar.
And I was sporting a couple of parallel scratches on my cheek that I got from running through some bushes.
But you thought you looked a bit like Adam Ant.
You looked a lot like Adam Ant.
And I thought, I'm the coolest.
And when the scars started to fade,
I was very much tempted to deepen them.
Like Bruce Willis in Die Hard 4.0, he's got a ludicrous set of scratches that are just designed to look cool.
One of- that's one of the hallmarks of a successful Hollywood action hero is to be able to be scarred in a sexy way.
Sexy and scarred.
Yeah, so anyway, here's some associates from April 1981.
This is a track called Me Myself and the Tragic Story.
Oh, dearie me.
Oh, dear, if that hasn't woken you up, nothing will.
That's The Associates, recorded for John Peel on Radio One on the 28th of April 1981.
It's a track called Me, Myself and the Tragic Story.
We can't figure out whether that comes off an Associates album or whether that's a track that only really existed alive or maybe a beast side or something.
Sounds as if they may have just made that.
As on the spot.
I only ever played it once.
Yeah.
So.
You don't understand the associates.
They're good, man.
They're a great band.
Do text us or email us if you know the source of that track.
But it was a good one, wasn't it?
It was pretty... It was hardcore associates.
It had some pretty nuts.
Delightful nuts.
Now, we've been asking you to text us in with your suggestions for the next step that the Phenomenum... Phenomenum.
Phenomenum.
Phenomenum.
Ah, I'm so tired.
What?
The next step that social networking sites will take?
Carry on talking, Adam, please.
The beds come in to try and give us a bit of... Emergency!
Get James Brown in, please!
It's like the radio equivalent of one of those pulmonary heart restart things.
What are they called?
Yes, yes, those shocker things.
I can't think of... My brain normally doesn't even start working until about two in the afternoon.
Well, you know, listeners, we're almost at the halfway point in our two-week stint filling in for shonk evening, and it's been a bit of a cold shower for us getting up this early and trying to be, like, lucid.
You know, because I've got up early in my life before, right?
Yeah.
Because every now and again you have to, maybe to catch a plane or something like that.
Yeah, or if you're filming something for telly, you have to get up terribly early.
But not day after day.
today like maybe three times in a row that's the most it's ever happened to me for us it's like a kind of David Blaine art magic experiment isn't it's like we're trapped in a sort of glass box suspended over over central London
very early every morning.
And I feel like I'm jet lagged the rest of the day.
Do you?
And my groggy brain just gets little snatches of things that I said on this radio show coming back to me and just some of the malformed, mangled, rubbish sentences that I've come out with just come back to haunt me throughout the rest of the day.
But you know what?
The vast majority of people who listen between seven and ten will probably be getting up this early regularly.
I know, exactly.
A couple of spoiled, mollycoddled... I don't know what the word would be.
Dicks.
Very possibly.
Would that be the word?
I don't think so.
I don't think that would be the word.
Yeah, it would.
Anyway, shall we have a little bit more music?
Yeah, okay.
While we punish you for saying that.
Oh, come on, I'm allowed that.
Are we gonna have some Edwin Collins?
Yeah, this is... Edwin Collins is a terrific new single.
I love this one, it's called You'll Never Know.
That's very good, isn't it?
That's Edwin Collins' new single, You'll Never Know.
I just love hearing his voice.
It's like hearing the voice of an old friend.
That's true, isn't it?
He was the soundtrack of many of our favourite youthful moments.
Yes.
All of which are gone now.
Very old.
We've been asking you listeners to email in with your suggestions of how social networking sites will progress in the future, how we can all make millions of pounds like the child who invented Facebook, who's now living in a massive house made out of jelly beans.
So here is some of the stuff what you've texted in.
First of all, dear Adam and Jo, please read this text out.
Love from Andy and Amanda.
That's a good one.
Thanks, Andy and Amanda.
I've done it.
Here's another one.
Is that all I have to say?
Yeah, yeah.
Please read this out.
I thought that deserved to be read out.
It's blunt cheekiness attracted me.
Okay, here's one that's on topic.
The site would be called Nosebag.
It would open your emails for you and spread rumours about you.
That's quite a good one, isn't it?
You'd just get an email saying, Nosebag has intercepted your emails and CC'd them to the following people.
Yeah, that's quite good.
Yeah, and in order to stop that happening, you'd have to log on to Nosebag.
And that Nosebag would have you, it would be able to start selling advertising, and the adventure of Nosebag would be a billionaire.
Yeah, yeah, and it's also not totally dissimilar to what happens already, except in reverse.
Because you know, a lot of the time you find yourself getting emails saying, somebody has sent you a message on Facebook.
So you have to log into Facebook to see the message
that they could have just emailed to you in the first place!
Do you hear me?
You know what I'm saying?
Yeah.
Sorry, I got a little angry.
You were angry about that.
I was furious there.
But, you know, like, all you've done is double the time.
It takes you to read a message.
I know, I know.
Someone has made the point that... Someone has made the point that Facebook is just the internet anyway.
It's just the internet called Facebook and controlled by Facebook.
There's nothing that Facebook does that can't just be generally done on the internet.
Well, it narrows the field, doesn't it?
It makes it more localised so that it's just the people that presumably you once bumped into that you're dealing with.
Dominic?
has taken on our idea of the bitsandbobs.com, the site that would create a naked avatar of you that you'd be compelled to log on to check the size of your bits.
He says, I like the bits idea.
Could it be like Wikipedia?
So anybody who's genuinely seen you naked could edit the photos so they become more and more accurate.
So you have your nude avatar and it would say yesterday this nude avatar was edited by Trish who you slept with when you were 22 and she's made your winkle smaller.
That's right.
Trish remembers that you had an unsightly birthmark in your left inner thigh.
Exactly.
That's a very good idea, Dominic.
Very good.
Here's one more final one.
This is my favourite from Aaron in Radcliffe.
The next big internet thing will be a mash-up of MySpace and Facebook called Sit on My Facebook.
Right.
How is that a mash-up of MySpace and Facebook?
I don't know.
Let's ask the news readers, because it's time for news on BBC 6 Music Red by Catherine and Adrian.
There she goes with summer in her hair.
Yeah.
Is that a track by Timothée?
Mmm.
Yeah, that's beatific visions.
Does Timothée still exist?
I don't know if it does, you know.
Timothee.
I think it might have been phased out.
Really?
Because they found that it wasn't real sunshine they were using.
Really?
Yeah.
What were they using?
Just nuclear bits?
Yeah, all they'd done was fried up some drizzle.
Really?
Yeah, and they'd kind of blasted it with neutrons.
You're so clever.
I know!
You're so clever, you know everything.
I do know, I'm like Stephen Fry.
Hey, this is Adam and Jo, this is BBC Six Music.
It's five past eight.
It's the middle of our exciting breakfast show.
It's a Friday, so it couldn't be more exciting here in the studio.
Funny it wasn't so early, that's the only thing that's struggling a little bit.
But we are going to talk to Ben right now because he's our serial thriller today.
He's picked out a couple of tracks for us.
Ben Kelly, that's a good name.
Ben, are you there?
Good morning, Adam.
Good morning, Joe.
Hey, you sound like a sensible, level-headed kind of a person.
Well, thank you very much.
And you should be because you work for American Express.
Yes, I do, for my sins, yes.
What kind of things do you do for them?
What will you be doing when you go into the office today, Ben?
Looking on the internet, probably.
And do you spend a lot of time just goofing off and pretending to work and just looking at stuff on YouTube?
I used to, but I have to be sent to all these things.
I used to, but I have to be sent to all these things.
I used to, but I have to be sent to all these things.
I used to, but I have to be sent to all these things.
I used to, but I have to be sent to all these things.
I used to, but I have to be sent to all these things.
I used to, but I have to be sent to all these things.
I think it's Midnight Express.
Oh, no, that's a great film.
It is a great... It's a weird film to have as your favourite, though, Pen, because it's quite... Do you, like, watch it, you know, over and over again?
Do you come home and think, oh, I really fancy seeing a man molested in the shower, a traumatic drugs bust, and then somebody speared through the back of their head by a clothes peg?
really whether they're the three top moments in that film come on what's the the fourth top moment is when he gets a visit from his girlfriend and he's such a sorry position in his life that I won't go into yeah kids if you haven't seen midnight expresses
It's an ideal film to watch when you're about 14, isn't it?
Yes.
And when you sort of don't know that that kind of thing ever went down in the world.
So there's two recommendations for younger listeners, Della Sol's Three Feet High and Rising, and a copy of Midnight Express.
Directed by Alan Parker, and tragically the star of that film is no longer alive.
He died very young.
Now, what's he called?
Ah, what is he called?
Do you know that, Ben?
The actor's name?
Yeah.
It's not Brian Keith.
Billy something.
Someone can text us that.
We'll find out.
For a favourite film, it's surprising you don't know the name of the lead actor.
Very strange.
A little disappointed with you, Ben.
Have you ever actually seen the film?
never seen in my life.
That's what I thought.
And you went go-karting last weekend.
He's not six.
He did.
You said that and you went go-karting last weekend.
He is six.
He is six.
He's a genius six-year-old who works for American Express, advising them on how to make the company more attractive to six-year-olds.
Was it?
Did you win the go-karting?
I was rubbish.
I thought all those years of Mario Kart would have paid dividends.
Really on my stag weekend.
We went go karting.
I was excited about it I think I may have come second or even one I got really competitive Joe had a little kind of brain fart.
I'm with Ben and because I play a lot of Mario kart as well I was hoping it would translate to the real world.
It doesn't know.
No, what do you have anything to fire?
He was puttering along at the back
He got really terrified Did you get frightened Ben?
That's not a very nice thing to say.
On the actual track, we're assuming.
Yeah, on the actual track, of course.
There you go.
Now, what music have you picked out for us today, Ben?
I've got Primal Spring Loaded and Granddaddy Crystal Lake.
Oh, Crystal Lake.
That's a lovely track.
Does that have anything to do with the Friday the 13th films?
Crystal Lake.
Because, of course, it's Camp Crystal Lake where they all get chopped up, isn't it, Ben?
Does that have anything to do with that?
It may well do.
Listen carefully to the lyrics.
We're going to play that one first, but thank you very much indeed, Ben.
Yeah, same to you.
Here's Friday the 13th night.
Ch-ch-ch!
there you go and this is granddaddy with crystal lake there we go that was uh this week's serial thriller courtesy of ben kelly uh thanks a lot ben nice choices we were talking about where the sample came from in the primal scream track loaded and it was peter fonda in a film called the wild angel all about bikers i think he made it before easy rider i think did he done it he did done it before easy rider i think and that was a little sample from it there so thanks a lot ben yeah good tracks
Yeah, and hello, we're Adam and Joe, this is BBC6 Music, it's just coming up to 20 past eight, we're doing the breakfast show, uh, this week, we've done it all this week, and we're doing it next week.
Yeah, it's all done.
It's almost more or less all done.
It's all sorted, love.
It should take another week.
Invoice will be in the past.
Then we'll be out.
Don't use it for a couple of days, let it settle.
Don't worry, Keeve knew we'd be back.
Yeah, we'll be here for about another week, that's it.
Do you want me to sweep that up?
Yeah, it's not a problem.
We can paint.
We can fix all that.
Guaranteed for two years.
Have you been having dreams about your builders again?
No, no.
I was telling Adam I had a bizarre dream the other day where I was very angry with my builder friend.
Adam and I used the same builder.
He's a lovely guy.
I've got no reason to be angry with him.
But in this dream, I was furious with him.
He'd completely re-wallpapered a wall that I didn't want re-wallpapered.
Oh, you idiot.
I was so angry.
Yeah.
I just must be angry about something else.
And in your dream, when you were angry with him... him... him... were you... him... were you expressing your anger in a manly way or were you a little bitch?
Was your voice cracking and were you sort of shaking and being a bit of a late man?
No, I just get dreams where I'm... where I'm just full of furious energy and frustration, basically.
Frustration.
Right.
That's what my life's all about.
Yeah, because you're keeping it all buttoned up.
Keeping it all in.
keeping it all in and then in your dreams you turn into... Not always, not every night.
Most nights.
But not every night.
Anyway, you're not allowed to talk about your dreams, it's boring, right?
It is a little bit boring.
Yeah.
Now, listeners, we're going to be doing Text the Nation, which has become one of Britain's most loved
uh interactive things it's britain's favorite feature it's britain's favorite feature in the tv quick awards yeah it's been nominated for a mobo britain's favorite feature yeah it's an exciting feature that in which we do what we've done all through the show invite your texts but this time with a jingle
Yeah, is that good enough is what people like that's what people want so that's exciting And we've got a really kind of slightly cheesy theme to text in on a sort of good Stupid breakfast show type thing yeah exactly because normally of course the level of debate and interaction here is like the intellectual It's very highbrow, but we're gonna be a little trivial today for you, but before that
How about some more block-rocking beats from those Chemical Brothers?
Uh, although the track is not block-rocking beats, that was a bad introduction because it used the name of one of their other tracks.
Anyway, this is called the Salmon Dance.
How about some dancing salmon?
How about some salmon dancing from the Chemical Brothers?
That's what I mean.
Who's hungry?
Me, I'm hungry.
That's the Chemical Brothers with the Salmon Dance, and that features Fat Lip.
Is that the Fat Lip formerly of The Far Side?
I think it must be, yeah.
It must be.
Listeners, Fat Lip is a bit of a genius.
He was the lead rapper-type person of a fantastic hip-hop group called The Far Side, who sadly split up after making a couple of amazing albums.
But he did release a solo album in America only that I bought a couple of copies of, a couple of copies of when I was last over there, and it's brilliant.
All the tracks are too sweary, so I've never been able to play them on the radio.
Right.
But Fat Lip is a genius.
What's it called, the album?
I can't remember.
Oh.
Yeah, I can't remember.
I'll find out for you in a second.
I do love it, though.
It's one of those albums that I love so much, I never really paid attention to the title.
Yeah.
Do you ever get that?
You just stick it in and stick it in iTunes and kind of forget what it's called.
Especially in the computer age, certainly when you load stuff onto your... Titles are almost becoming... What's the word?
Ob- obsolete.
Ob- obsolete.
Ob- obsolete.
Irrelevant.
Yeah, and that's a bit of a sort of, it sounds a bit like a nerd track as well on the track.
It's a weird sort of amalgam of fashionable, you know, urban music styles by the Chemical Brothers.
Yeah, he says, you feelin' me?
That's a new street phrase, isn't it?
No.
You feelin' me?
No.
Are you feelin' me?
No.
Why?
Why?
Because that's the oldest street phrase.
You feelin' me?
I only just heard that, watching prison break the other day.
Really?
Yeah.
How long's that been around?
40,000 years.
40,000 years?!
No one ever tells me anything.
You feelin' me?
No, I'm not feeling you.
What are you talking about?
Now listen, just before 8.30, we're gonna play you a special track, which is the Rebel Playlist winner from Steve LaMax Show.
Can you explain all this business, Adam?
No.
Steve LaMac has... He gets people to vote for tracks that are not currently on the six-music playlist, and they sort of vote against each other, and then the winner of that gets on the playlist.
It gets played all the time.
So this is the winner.
It's by Lou Rhodes.
It's the Rainer.
I think this has probably been voted for by a lot of very anxious women.
Ladies.
It's lady music.
Listen to this.
New roads, uh, with the rain, this is Adam and Joel on BBC Six Music, a kind of female Travis Bickle there, waiting for the rain to come and wash all the scum off the streets.
And I said before that, uh, because it had won the Rebel playlist on Steve LaMac's show, it was now part of the Six Music playlist.
Wrong.
wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong
We were, we were referring to it as a sort of a breakfast show cliche.
We're playing it.
That's the Boo Radleys with Wake Up Boo.
That was amongst our list of songs that would be great to wake up to yesterday.
Other ones I thought of were Six Pints None the Richer and... This was like a list of cliches.
Fairground attraction, perfect.
So maybe Six Pints None the Richer will be in the playlist on Monday.
But now, listeners, it's time for our most in- the- in fact, the nation's- The nation's favourite feature.
Radio feature.
Yeah.
Here's the jingle.
Text-a-nation.
Text, text, text.
Text-a-nation.
What if I don't want to?
Text-a-nation.
But I'm using email.
Is that a problem?
It doesn't matter.
Text!
You know what, it's probably illegal to say it's Britain's favourite feature, especially as this is the BBC, the Big British Castle.
That's true.
There's... You can probably be had up on charges and led away in the studio.
No, but it's such a nebulous statement, anyway.
Yeah.
I mean, people use it all the time.
Because it's impossible to prove.
The nation's favourite, in fact, the BBC use it all the time.
Right.
The nation's favourite poem, that sort of business.
Yes.
It's not the nation, it's just whoever happens to text in.
That's right.
And I think there's a sort of unspoken understanding that it's a load of bullies.
Do British Airways still call themselves the world's favourite airline?
No, in fact they call themselves the world's least favourite airline.
Now, they spent millions of pounds on focus groups and that was the conclusion the focus group came up with, the world's least favourite airline.
And now, on the tails of their planes, they've got a picture of a miserable middle-aged woman with two toddlers sitting on a suitcase.
In fact, she's not sitting on a suitcase because they lost it.
Anyway, you get the general idea.
That's not to say that they are the worst airline.
They're no better or worse than any other airline.
These are not the opinions of the big British castle.
They are merely the opinions of Joseph Murray Cornish.
giving away my middle name there anyway okay so it's text the nation time and this is an important event here on the show where we ask you to text us in on a subject of our choosing it's a sort of a national survey the results are then given to the government who make various policy decisions based on them yeah they are not true books that's true that is true parliament will be buzzing about the results of this this afternoon
And this afternoon today this afternoon what hello this morning.
We're asking you to text in Like foods that you dislike for absolutely no reason at all for sort of infantile reasons is it food just food or well?
We're gonna start with food we can broaden it to other infantile things But yesterday my girlfriend and lovely partner asked me whether I like rice pudding and blue She said do you like rice pudding?
Yeah, and I thought no I don't know who does and she said why not?
And I thought, I thought, why don't I like rice pudding?
And I realised that I hadn't thought about rice pudding since I was about four or five and had taken a kind of tactical, meaningless decision to dislike it.
And you know the only reason I could come up with?
Because it looks like maggots in milk.
That's a good reason.
Yeah, or frog spawn.
Exactly.
And that infantile attitude to rice pudding I've clung to for the last 59 years.
Check this out.
Not only does it look like frog spawn, it looks like frog spawn with a poo crust.
How's that for you?
Well, that's an old rice pudding does, once it forms a crust.
No, but some people like it with the crust, don't they?
So what we're asking you listeners to do is to text us, 64046, or email us, AdamAndJoeAt6Music, no, hang on a second, AdamAndJoe.6MusicAtBBC.co.uk, text us with foodstuffs that you dislike for no good reason at all.
We're not interested in you having an allergy.
We're not interested in you like having had some kind of traumatic accident based with the food We want completely spurious reasons like I don't like tomatoes because I can't tell whether they're a fruit or a vegetable They're just too squishy.
They're too squishy.
They explode like a little man's head
when you bite into them.
Well, my big problem is cheese, of course, and I'm in the position now where I'm still going to dinner parties once in a while and having to... Explain why you don't like cheese.
Yeah, exactly.
And the reason... And why don't you like cheese?
It smells of socks.
It smells of socks.
That's why, because it smells of death and socks, and I'm not having it.
Yeah, so text in your highly immature reasons for disliking a particular food.
Uh, 64046 is the number.
Uh, here's some music.
This is, isn't it?
We're doing a swap around here.
This is Calvin Harris.
I've got tables and chairs in my house.
I've got a stinky cat in my house.
I've got a brand new lab in my house.
I've got a lovely bed in my house.
I've got...
Hello, this is Element Joe, BBC Six Music on The Breakfast Show.
It's just gone quarter to nine.
That was Calvin Harris with, uh, what was it called again?
Mary Making It My Place.
Yeah.
Reminds me a little bit of Flight of the Conchords.
Really?
Yeah.
Now, Flight of the Conchords listeners, if you don't know about them, they're from New Zealand, they're a comedy duo, they're the latest big thing, they've got a show on HBO, you can download their radio shows, right?
Can you?
Yeah.
Nautily, maybe.
Maybe.
Nautily.
You can also check out their HBO program on BitTorrent.
It's well worth having a look at.
That's naughty as well.
I think it's gonna be... There's clips on YouTube, right?
Put Fly to the Concord into YouTube and you'll see their stuff.
They're really funny.
It's gonna be on BBC Four later this year, I think.
and it's well worth looking at.
If BBC Four isn't closed down, thanks to the budget cuts, that's another kettle of wands.
Welcome to Tex the Nation, the nation's favourite feature, breakfast show feature.
I've qualified it slightly there a bit.
the nation's favorite feature yeah okay that's what it is okay we've been asking you what food stuffs you dislike for completely immature and nonsensical reasons do you want to hear some of the responses what we've got yeah well i'll give you another example go on before we do i've got a problem with cauliflower yes because it looks like brains
It's like eating the brain.
You know, the ironic thing is it's amazingly good for you.
It's a power food.
It's brain food.
It probably is brains.
Is it really good for you?
It's veggie brains.
Yeah, it is.
Because it's just like white broccoli, isn't it?
Or is that Brussels sprouts?
Is it Brussels sprouts that are incredibly good for you?
Anything green and sort of raw is really good for you.
Yeah, but it's white though.
Cauliflower is like white broccoli and it's pointless.
It doesn't taste... Well, that's good, man, because what we're looking for is completely irrational.
reasons to like it so here's one from Dave he says I hate curry it looks like cat vomit that's absolutely true correct well done Dave absolutely correct and anyone who does like curry it follows likes eating cat vomit that's true well that's not very nice because millions of people like
I laughed, it's one of Britain's favourite things.
Listen, Joe, I love curry.
Do you?
I was thinking of having one tonight, in fact, as a celebration for getting a lion for a morning.
Someone heated up some fishy cat vomit, and told you it was fishy curry.
Do you think you'd tell the difference?
Now I'm going to think about it.
I'm going to maybe have a look.
Here's a good one from Lucy.
I can't eat peppers because a boy at school used to fold his eyelids back and it looked like the inside of a pepper.
That's a very good one.
That's a really, but that's perfect Lucy.
If this was a competition, which it isn't, you'd get a prize there.
So you get a theoretical prize.
That's pretty insane though.
She worked it out in her head that it looked like peppers, or maybe the first time she saw a pepper, it was like...
Oh no, that's like Charlie's folded eyelids.
I'm not eating that.
Dan in Woking, here's a very good one.
He doesn't like baby corn because it's pretentious.
What's wrong with normal sized corn?
That's a good point.
Yeah, well done, Dan.
Absolutely correct.
Emma in Huddersfield.
I've never eaten cottage cheese because it looks like someone has already chewed it up and spat it into the tub.
We'll have some more of these in just a second.
First, here's a trail, and then we're going to have some music from the Small Faces.
Oh, that's good, isn't it?
Come on.
Lazy Sunday by Small Faces.
I like the way that he does the first half of that song in his cook.
He's kind of crazy, not me, little voice.
And then the second half, he just decides to go rock with it, you know?
Lazy Sunday afternoon.
Kinda weird.
But it works, and that's what it's all about.
Hi, this is Adam and Joe here on 6 Music, just covering for Sean Kievny for a couple of weeks.
That's Joe clearing his throat there.
Yeah, it's quite a manly sort of Edwardian cough.
Very good.
Away from the mic, polite, I like it.
Uh, we're involved in, uh, the nation's favorite feature, Tex the Nation.
We've been asking you to tell us your highly immature food dislikes.
You know, food that you dislike for no rational reason, and that you've disliked since you were a small child, and maybe now you're in your late hundreds, and you still dislike it for the same reason!
Infantile aversions.
That kind of thing.
You know, we were talking about, uh, I've got a problem with cauliflower, cause it's like eating brains!
Uh, someone... Joe's got a problem with rice pudding because it's like maggots in milk.
Yeah, here's a good one from Bryn in bed.
That's, uh, I think his bed rather than a place.
He says, I can't eat or she, would that be what sex would Bryn be?
Bryn?
Yeah.
There's absolutely no telling.
No telling.
He or she is saying, I can't eat mushy peas because it looks like someone's been collecting bogeys and forming a large green ball of snot.
Well, mushy peas, I mean, that's a disgraceful food.
Yeah, that's quite an obvious one there, Bryn, but very good nonetheless.
Absolutely.
Stevie Sticks from Hull, is that a real name?
Stevie Sticks, I hope it is.
I hate raisins because they look like shriveled up rabbit droppings.
That's exactly what my five-year-old son said the other day, so that's brilliant.
They're delicious!
Well, they are.
They're lovely.
That's what I said to him.
I was like, go on, just try one.
No, they look like rabbit poos!
Here's a connected one.
You know what would be good with these texts is to know your age as well.
That would be interesting to know how old you are to have these really immature thoughts.
Here's one from Aiden in Balimena.
He says, and this is a very common one, Garibaldi biscuits, thousands of dead flies mashed up, and no one will sway me on that.
Again, they're delicious.
They're known in some places as dead fly biscuits, squash fly biscuits, aren't they?
I think so.
And here's another very good one.
This is from Wendy.
She says, I can't stand the thought of eating sandwich spread because it looks like sick.
When I was going out with my husband before we were married, we'd get back to his place and he would make sandwich spread sandwiches.
No, they are revolting.
We've got a few more of these coming up for you, but first here's Juliana Hatfield with her three, and a track called Spin the Bottle.
Juliana Hatfield 3 with Spin the Bottle.
It's time now to hear a couple more texts just before we go to the news from our feature text donation.
And we're asking people to text in kind of infantile aversions to various foodstuffs.
Yeah.
Um, okay.
You ready for some good ones?
Go on then.
Rob in Birmingham has an aversion to drinking apple juice.
Can you guess why?
Uh, is it anything to do with urine?
Yes.
I don't like drinking apple juice because it looks like stale wee wee.
Yeah.
Rob from Birmingham.
I'd imagine Rob's in his late twenties, probably.
Stale.
Do you think?
He's going for the cloudy apple juice, is he?
Is he?
Well, you can get it.
Cloudy or clear.
Yeah.
Just like the real thing.
It does it.
Ah, yeah.
I wonder what... Yeah, let's not go there anyway.
There's all sorts of things we need to talk about.
Let's go away from there.
We were a late-night program, but we're not.
Here's somebody anonymous who's saying, my stepson won't eat choco hoops since his dad cruelly said that they were rabbits bumholes.
Oh, dear.
It's all basically fairly lavatorial.
One day he'll realise, what sort of thing is that?
to do to your steps, son.
Imagine the shock on the poor child's face.
Plus, it's true, they are rabbits bumholes.
I happen to know there's a big factory somewhere in the northeast, rabbits in one end, chukka hoops out the other.
I don't even know what chukka hoops are.
They're rabbits bumholes.
Tim in Brighton says, weird food dislikes, colon.
I can't eat pork scratchings anymore.
Why?
Why do you think that is, Adam?
Ahhh.
Pork scratchings?
Pork scratchings, are they like giant bogey?
No.
Never see those pictures of like Indian guys who've got incredibly long toenails.
Oh, yeah.
Tim in Brighton says, I can't eat pork scratchings anymore.
They remind me of my brother's fungal nail infection.
No one's going to be able to eat anything.
No, exactly.
One final one.
And this is, I really like this one.
This is from Robin Sheffield.
This is good because it's just ridiculous, but yet it has a kind of element of truth about it.
Tomatoes are repellent, says Rob, as appetizing as a bag of pus.
Only genetically modifying them to grow in sachets could correct this.
As tomato ketchup?
Possibly.
Yeah, I know what you mean, Rob.
It's that sort of popping thing when you pop.
I never used to like tomatoes, but you know what?
I've got into them recently.
And they're very good, especially for men.
They make men more manly.
Well done.
You're a grown-up.
But no, I used to dislike them for the same reason, because when you pop your fork into them, it's like popping a fork into an elf's head.
Into a giant red bubo.
Okay, now it's time for the news.
Text-a-nation!
Text, text, text!
Text-a-nation!
What if I don't want to?
Text-a-nation!
But I'm using email!
Is that a problem?
It doesn't matter!
Text!
Yes, it's Adam and Joel on BBC Six Music, and in case you don't recognise that jingle, it's Text the Nation, the nation's favourite feature, as kind of survey that we do on some stupid subject, the results of which then go to the government so that they can build new policies and laws around them.
That's true.
Incidentally, I should just say that you were listening to, music-wise, Richard Hawley there with tonight, the streets are ours, and before that it was the Libertines with Don't Look Back Into the Sun.
Now back to Text the Nation.
Joe, thank you very much Adam.
Text the Nation today is asking you what foods you dislike for infantile reasons, things you decided you didn't like when you were a tiny child, and you stuck with that attitude until your adult-ness years.
Here's three more.
I've been told by my fellow presenters that some of the ones we were reading out before were a little bit disgusting.
We were drifting into the... A bit lavatorial.
Into the bum zone.
Yeah, so we're going to reverse out of that area into a more clean, fresh and sort of healthy area.
Here's one from an anonymous texter that actually stays in that area.
My friend doesn't like eating bananas because it reminds him of rude behavior with a man.
What?
That's useless.
You think so?
It's not something you think about when you're a toddler, though, for goodness sake.
No, but what if you were an adult, you were with someone of indiscriminate sexuality who you thought might have a crush on you, and you decided you wanted a banana?
You don't have to eat it suggestively, though.
Yeah, but would you actually break the banana off and eat it in that way so as not to give him any ideas?
I don't know.
Let's reverse out of this.
Here's another one.
Shush.
Food stuff, couscous.
This is from Dan in Woking.
I don't like couscous because I get bored halfway through eating it.
It's a repetitive food.
It's a funicity food.
It's just like a powder.
Well, it's also quite... it's not exactly a taste explosion, Cuscus.
No, Cuscus is boring.
He gets bored halfway through.
I think that's fair enough, Dan.
That's a good reason.
Finally, this is from Aidan, who's 38.
We assume his wife is a similar kind of age.
He's saying, my wife Catherine can't eat celery because it gives her, and I quote, a funny feeling in her spine.
Funny feeling in a spine.
I know what you mean about that.
There's some things that just sit, sort of give you a weird little nerve reaction when you eat them sometimes.
You know, like maybe an orange, if you get a weird orange sometimes, you get a little tingle.
A little zesty tingle.
Unpleasant tingle.
Yeah.
And then finally, Amy Crossthwaite is basically opening up a big can of worms.
She's saying she can't stand fruit in savoury food.
And Amy, I agree with you completely.
A bit of pineapple on a pizza, to me, is like putting a bomb in my heart.
Yeah.
No, it's horrible.
It's very... Can't mix the two.
It's very odd.
But thank you very much for everybody who's texted.
Uh, all that information will go straight, uh, to the houses of Parliament.
To Gordon Brown.
To Gordon Brown.
He'll be studying those for the rest of the afternoon and we can expect an announcement.
Here's my impression of Gordon Brown getting the results of Test the Nation.
Test the Nation.
Oh!
The results of Test the Nation are through!
We're gonna have to change some policies!
Mmm!
Well, he's Scottish, clearly.
Well done.
That's quite good, isn't it?
That's pretty good.
I'm like Rory Bremner.
In a way, yeah.
I'm Gordon Brown.
Is that it?
Yeah.
It's always struck me as strange, impressionists who have to say who they are.
It was very popular in the 70s, wasn't it?
No.
They never did that.
Did they?
Yeah, they did, yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, they did.
Okay, this is Adam and Jo on BBC Six Music.
It's 12 minutes past nine.
You can tell when I'm struggling because I do a time check.
And it's time for... Is it my free choice?
Yeah, this is an exciting single, sure, to give you a bit of a boost this morning.
It's by a band called Roderigo.
It's called Lack of Afro.
That's Rodrigo with Lack of Afro.
This is Adam and Jo on BBC6 Music.
It's quarter past nine.
It's the time of the show when most working people have gone into work.
And our listenership is kids, mums, robbers, people in prison, people on oil rigs, people abroad.
I was thinking about Sandra Bullock the other day.
Yep.
Jo, I just wanted to get this off my chest.
You know, she's one of the highest paid actresses in Hollywood.
I've met her, Adam.
In the dream lavatory.
Um, where did you meet her?
I interviewed her.
When I was doing the Radio 4 film programme, I spent 15 minutes in her company and Hugh Grant's company.
You know, me and 50 billion other journalists did.
Right.
We weren't all in the room.
You know, all the journalists had little 15-minute segments and she was over for... Two weeks' notice.
Yeah, yeah.
That's right.
And how was she?
Very nice?
She was beautiful.
She's a lovely woman.
She had the skin of a child.
Translucent skin.
She was lovely.
Just in a bag.
Grant was a little bit temperamental.
Was he?
Yeah.
A little bit sarcastic.
He was tired, sarcastic, yeah.
Bullock, she was generous in every way.
100% professional.
Yeah.
Well, that's good.
Well, you know what?
She is maybe the number six or number seven highest paid actress in Hollywood.
She gets 30 pounds of film.
Here's a few of the salaries she's commanded for some of her recent films.
Speed 2, Cruise Control, 1997.
She got 12 and a half million dollars for that.
You know, that's 12 and a half million times more than what it made at the box office.
Right.
Hope Floats 1998.
A little dip.
Only 11 million dollars she got for that one.
28 days.
Do you remember that one?
She was in rehab or something in that film?
Yeah.
In 2000 she got 12 and a half million again.
And Murder by Numbers... Does anyone recall that one at all?
I recall the police song of the same name.
I think I maybe saw Murder by Numbers on a plane and the denouement features her hanging from a house that is crumbling into the sea or something and there's a dirty man, a bad man, who wants to push her off the house and it sounds brilliant.
It's really not.
How much did she get?
for that 15 million dollars wow that's the kind of fee and and one can only assume that she's getting more than that for for her more recent films things like the lake house the lake house her and Keanu I imagine that that reteaming that pairing must have been very expensive yeah you saw that one didn't you Adam I remember you talking to me about it angrily
Yeah, it's pretty nutty stuff.
And of course, that film was a big deal for Bullock fans and Keanu fans because, as we said, it was re-pairing this team that actually based their entire career on the film Speed, which is where they first met, way back in... Now, Speed is a classic.
Yeah, 1994.
Speed is the film, I think, that made Sandra Bullock's career.
And she's kind of relied on it ever since, or relied on the goodwill that that film generates.
So what's your point here, Adam?
I am just curious about actors who have managed to pull this trick off, you know what I mean?
Rather than people sort of taking about three or four films to sort of think, yeah, she was pretty good in speed, but she hasn't really done a film as enjoyable as that since.
You know instead of that they just carried on paying her more and more and more money Film after film after film like check out some of these films after speed The net now that in retrospect looks like a classic mm-hmm doesn't it?
Mm-hmm it wasn't oh no two if by see Remember that one no a time to kill
In love and war, speed 2 cruise control.
Hooray!
Practical magic, the prince of Egypt, forces of nature, and it goes on.
It's a parade of stinkers.
Miss Congeniality.
That was a hit that a lot of people liked.
Did you like that one, Jenny?
Yeah, Jenny, come on.
Lisa, you're a lady?
Did you like Miss Congeniality?
No, I didn't.
No, because you'd have to be insane.
You'd have to be clinically insane to enjoy Miss Congeniality.
Yeah.
And even Miss Congeniality 2 as well, which came out.
I mean, it's just baffling.
So you're angry that she's still commanding figures in the tens of millions.
No, I'm curious.
You're curious.
How do you pull this off?
How do you make bad film after bad film, but still command 10 million pound fees?
What is it?
What's the secret?
I'm curious about it.
And I'm curious to know if anyone can think of other actors who've had a similar career trajectory.
One good film very early on and then carried on getting paid more and more and more money for stinker after stinker.
Now, here's my breakfast single of the week.
This is Spoon with the Underdog.
Steel Pulse with Ku Klux Klan.
This is Adam and Joe here on BBC 6 Music.
We're covering for Sean Keveny for a couple of weeks and today is the end of our first week and then we've got next week to go and then that's your lot.
We're debating here about how to handle the weekend because we've reset our body clocks to get up at 5.30 a.m.
I have personally.
So I can leave at 6.15, be in the studio for about quarter to seven, start the show at seven, but the weekend is a dangerous trap.
Right, because you could be reset.
Yeah, we could push it too late.
You know, we could get overexcited tonight or Saturday night and find ourselves very tired.
What time have you been going to bed in the evening?
Nine.
Nine.
Yeah, and I've been loving it.
I'm loving it.
Last night, I watched Ten Years Younger.
Right.
And then went to sleep.
That's a ridiculous program.
Have you watched that?
I've got an idea for a sketch, which I don't think is very good, so I'll just waste it here.
Go on then.
The sketch is, you have kind of like a feature that's exactly like Ten Years Younger.
The voiceover would be exactly the same, talking about how they've done her lips, changed her clothes, rearranged her hair.
you know, but in the pictures, they'd be taking a woman and dressing her as a sort of freakish clown.
And then at the end, she'd just have a huge red nose.
You know, she'd just look like a mad old bag woman.
Yeah, we were always going to do that, like, on our show years ago, because that's the... Last night, they turned this perfectly nice looking woman into a mad old bag lady in this ridiculous polka dot dress, this huge...
necklace with giant beads, massive clown shoes, painted her face all up with julucks, did all her hair.
They put extensions in her hair listeners.
I don't know if anyone else saw this on Channel 4 last night.
They put extensions in her hair.
She wasn't used to having extensions.
She said, um, what sort of hair is it?
Where does it come from?
And the barber said, it comes from another lady.
Nice.
And she looked so sort of disgusted and creeped out by the idea that she'd probably had a prisoner's hair stitched into her own.
There's a horror film in there, isn't there?
A hair extensions-based horror film.
Yeah, exactly.
We'll be back shortly.
Right now, here's the news.
Boy, that sounds pretty good, doesn't it?
The human lead with Love Action.
That's an album that stands up really unbelievably well.
Dare.
Hey, this is Phil talking.
I want to tell you what I've found to be true.
It does, doesn't it?
And sorry to interrupt you, Alan Buxton, but they were on one of those stupid, you know, I love the 80s TV shows, The Human League, and they were kind of talking about themselves as if they weren't really a serious band.
Right.
as if they were a sort of novelty band that happened to have a couple of successful albums, then mistakenly tried to go all R&B, didn't they?
They went all kind of funky and then kind of lost the plot.
And I was watching Phil Okey talking about himself and thinking, man, don't do yourself down.
They're amazing and they sound amazing.
I think they're a proper, a proper kind of, you know, chapter in pop music history.
Yeah, very much so.
I mean, they had everything.
They were a proper band with real credible roots from part of that whole post-punk scene in Sheffield there, and then they came out with Dare, which was just unexpectedly massive.
You know what I mean?
I mean, that sold millions of albums.
And then what was their second album called?
It had the Lebanon on it and Louise and stuff like that.
Oh, what was it called?
And Keep Feeling Fascination.
That was an amazing album.
Mirror Moves, was it called?
No, no, that's the song of Delic First.
They did a song called Mirror Man.
Yeah.
But whatever, that was a great album.
In fact, there's a track off that called Louise.
Do you remember that track?
Yeah.
That my girlfriend can't listen to because it makes her feel too sad.
But yeah, that was, that was a really good album.
But that was the one that sort of put the mockers on their career a little bit because they, they wanted to go away from the whole synthy sound, strip it down, make it more guitar-y, you know, so, and ABC had a similar career trajectory, you know, they had the massive Trevor Horn-produced, um, Lexicon of Love, which is an amazing album, and then they were, they came back with Beauty Stab after that, which totally flummoxed everybody.
Anyway.
Anyway, there you go, a little bit of 80s music info for you there.
Early on before that, Adam was talking about the fact that Sandra Bullock, the sexy speed lady, is what I like to call her, has made one good film and then a load of old trollops, but still been paid huge amounts of money.
Yeah, like one of the most huge amounts of money ever, like Divine Secrets of the Yaya Sisterhood.
Has a man ever seen this film?
That's what I don't know.
They're not allowed to see it because it's not Divine Secrets.
That's one of those film titles that makes me silly.
And what are its secrets?
It's an adaptation of a hugely popular novel in the States, and the kind of thing that probably made it to number one in Oprah's book club.
But it's not a film I really want to see.
So I'm actually unfairly pre-judging it.
It might be amazing.
If you're a man and you've seen it, I really don't want to hear about more women who love it, because I know women love it.
Hey, look, I've found the bit of the microphone that actually makes me sound proper.
Instead of this bit over here.
OK, here we go.
Here's a text from someone called Phil.
He says, Ben Affleck.
He did goodwill hunting, then the last ten years have been a serious... Can we say that word?
Dogmark fest of eye-gouging films.
Yeah, is that true?
Has Affleck... Affleck was in... Was he in Armageddon?
That was a stinker.
Was he in Pearl Harbor, Affleck?
Was he?
I feel like he was, yeah.
He was in Jiggly.
It's true, poor old Affleck.
What must he feel about Matt Damon?
getting it right.
But he still paid a lot of money to turn up in things, Affleck.
So he's a good example of that.
Very good example there.
Here's another one.
I mean, Keanu has had a similar career trajectory.
Well, Lizzie here is saying... Although I guess he did the Matrix, didn't he?
Actors who are not much cop, but who make inexplicably tons of money.
Ewan McGregor and Clive Owen, says Lizzie.
I disagree that you and McGregor's not much cop.
I mean, it's the same with Bullock.
This is the thing.
It's that Bullock is talented.
When she's good, she's really good, you know.
Yeah.
And she's definitely got something.
But it's strange.
She seems to fritter away her talent on mad projects.
But McGregor's a good example of someone who does seem to come out with film after film.
He's been felled by Star Wars, hasn't he?
That was a mistake for McGregor.
shouldn't have taken the wars.
And finally, Chris in Hackney agrees with you, Adam.
Keanu Reeves is a monosyllabic goon who lucked out with the Matrix after making many stinkers.
Oh dear, dear.
I can't agree with that, Chris.
I'll take Bill and Ted any day.
Uh, he's been in some good stuff Keanu.
Can't think of it all right now, but I'm sure it exists.
Johnny Mnemonic.
Uh, right now it's time for one of my free choices.
This is from a great album that came out last year.
Oh, it's not.
Okay, sorry.
This is, uh, my free choice is coming up soon.
I'm gonna play some Young Knives for you, Young Knives fans.
But right now, here's a track from the album of the day.
This is Rylo Kylie with Give a Little Love.
So there you go.
On Bang Holiday Monday, not only have you got Harry Hill to entertain you at 3 in the afternoon here on 6 Music, but you've also got a whole day of reminiscences about a landmark year.
Ten years ago.
Can you believe it?
1997.
The last time that me and Joe were on TV.
That's not true.
No, it's not true.
but we were we were big in 97 man we were doing a second series third series why has BBC six music got Werner Herzog doing its trails the German guy play the guy that does the play that one that's got saying our names in a German accent
They just edited out a portion of a conversation with a homeless person and they said,
Is that what they've done for cost cutting?
Yeah, they've just said... Listen, we're gonna give you, if you just chat to us for a bit, we'll give you a couple of quid and you can meet, and you can eat, rather, Adam and Joe for breakfast.
And he's going, why would I want to do something like that and eat Adam and Joe for breakfast?
And they've just used the last bit.
And they've just chopped out the last bit.
I wanna hear that Werner Herzog does it as a trail.
We'll hear it later on, but first... Hands and your hair.
Your hands and your hair.
The forest is full of murder.
It's time now for my free choice.
This is a track from the excellent Young Knives album, their debut album, which is called Of Animals and Men.
I don't know if you've heard this one, Joe.
It's called Another Hollow Line.
And it's got some very entertaining harmonizing in it.
Like when the chorus comes along, first of all, listen out for the harmonies that these guys pull because they're insane.
This is called Another Hollow Line.
That's Interpol with Mammoth, and that's almost it for us here on a Friday afternoon on Six Music.
Yeah, let's just clean up one or two little emails.
The human league album in question is Hysteria.
Thanks for Chris.
Of course it was Hysteria, wasn't it?
Hysteria, there you go.
Some people complaining about us being rude about.
Film stars Keanu made my own private Idaho.
Much ado about nothing, says Miss Angie Reeves.
She liked them.
I agree with the former, but not with an actor.
Um, was it much to do about nothing?
What, you like much to do about nothing but nothing?
No, no, no, I'll take my own private IDO, but not much to do about nothing.
Much to do, Shakespeare never got better.
And someone, Chris Fieldsend says that changing lanes is excellent and Ben Affleck's in it.
And finally, Martin in Kensel Green in London.
Gentlemen.
It may only be me, but does anyone else find Sandra Bullock's nose freaks them out?
I'm convinced it belongs to Michael Jackson.
I like Sandra Bullock's nose, that little upturned nose.
Well, there's a girl in Emmerdale, isn't it, who has almost exactly the same nose, and she looks very much like Sandra Bullock if you cover up her mouth.
which is a fun thing to do if you ever bump into anyone.
You can't end the show by encouraging listeners to cover up women's mouths?
I think so.
What a way is that to go.
Listen, thanks a lot for listening.
We'll be back on Monday morning at 7am with our special celebration of 1997.
We've been Adam and Joe.
We'll see you next week.
Have a great weekend.
Here's Lush.