The Adam and Joe Archive - 20070824_060000_bbc6m_adam_and

The name of the bar, driving in a car tonight Fiddle style, get it in class Living it fast, it looks so easy Fiddle style, get it in class Living it fast tonight What to leave if it's impossible to say What to leave it when they change your name What to play

An elegant star, a terrible star It looks so easy, terrible star An elegant star and a terrible star tonight Terrible star, driving up the path Driving in a car, it looks so easy, terrible star

Take your name, won't you bring, bring

It's impossible

That was Suede with Filmstar.

Good morning.

This is Adam and Joe here on BBC6 Music on a Friday morning.

It's apparently going to be a fantastically beautiful sunny weekend.

That's right.

Although I was talking to a friend of mine yesterday and he was saying, what if it's just a...

a government conspiracy, the whole weather forecast thing.

They tell you it's going to be sunny, to keep you down, to stop you complaining, to cheer you up, and then it doesn't materialise.

Because the last couple of days, they said yesterday was going to be decent, the government.

Well, it was everywhere but London.

Was it?

Yeah.

That's what I'm saying.

Local London government.

Do you think?

Well, we'll find out.

This weekend will be proof, and on Monday we'll know whether we're all victims of a shadow weather conspiracy.

Yeah, exactly.

A shadowy weather conspiracy.

Welcome to the show.

We've got a terrific show lined up for you listeners.

We've got great music this hour, some De La Soul coming up, some Calvin Harris, that lovely Edwin Collins track.

I'm looking forward to that.

Fantastic.

We're also going to be talking about, you know, kind of friend networks, Myspace, Facebook type places, Twitter.

What's the other one?

Bebo?

Bebo.

I'm thinking about maybe what's next.

for the friend networking online phenomenon.

And also we have Textination in the second hour of our program here today.

Our amazing feature with its own jingle that we created specially just this week for the feature.

Yeah, in fact, we'll be serving up a delicious hot waffle for you all morning for breakfast.

High quality, delicious waffle with some inane sauce drizzled over the top.

Let's have some music now though.

This is the Kaiser Chiefs with the angry mob.

You're so fucked up till you turn it blue Repeating everything that you read So here we go with the light up How can you fix it with me?

It starts with just one and turns to two then three It's only cause you came here with your brothers too If you came here on your own you'd be dead Raise a glass until you raise a fist or two And get a shopping basket right round your head

We like who we like, we hate to hate, but we're all so easily swayed We are the angry mob, we read the papers every day We like who we like, we hate to hate, but we're all so easily swayed We are the angry mob, we read the papers every day

So they're the angry mob.

read the papers every day yeah it's just the Kaiser chiefs is it yeah they like who they like they hate who they hate and they like to buy the papers the papers every day they didn't read the pay all the papers every day maybe they wouldn't be so angry maybe they chill out you know yeah exactly yeah you know exactly

So, I had an alarming incident yesterday.

Did you?

Listeners, Adam.

Yeah, what happened?

I tried to log on to my MySpace page.

Right.

www.myspace.com forward slash Joe Cornish.

For the first time in about a month, I imagine you tried to log on there.

Yeah.

And it had been varicified.

Viralized?

Hackadoodled.

Why?

I don't know but I couldn't log in and then my email inbox started to fill up with messages from my spurious MySpace friends saying that I was offering them a deal on back to school trousers.

Oh really, they were complaining because they've been getting weird spam from you.

They were either complaining that I was offering them back to school trouser offers or that they tried to buy the back to school trousers and hadn't had any luck and the discount wasn't what I was promising them.

I suddenly found myself sucked into a school trouser selling kind of confusion.

School trousers?

And there was no sort of sexy aspect to this was there?

what you mean a sort of dirty one yeah because usually no it was purely a money off clothing offer that's unusual it is unusual isn't it yeah because usually with the net anything spam spam style yeah is either purely financial like please give us your bank details honestly we're from your bank look we've printed the logo of your bank in the corner of this piece of spam usually the royal bank of scotland

All of them do it.

All of them.

Barclays, Bank of Scotland, NatWest, anyone will do it.

They'll stick the logo in the corner there and ask you to get in touch.

I don't have an account with the Royal Bank of Scotland but they daily try and get my details from me.

Couple of times I've been tempted.

Have you?

To follow the link.

I'll put your details in, just in case there's some money waiting for you.

Well, I don't wanna, you know, they're carrying out emergency checks and my PIN number's been used.

They need to check the security.

They need my details.

Oh, I better give them.

Anyway, do you want to hear the end of my story, my MySpace story?

I changed my password, put up an apology, and that's the end.

Is it?

Yeah.

You changed your password, so no more spam hacking.

So somewhat, it's very easy to find the passwords of these things.

My brother, who's an IT guy, was telling me that with

Wi-Fi as well.

It's very easy to hack people's passwords You know what I mean?

If you go and there was a story in the paper yesterday about a bloke who got arrested for using Some random guys Wi-Fi standing outside his house The cops saw him with his laptop and he was tapping away on his laptop sat on the wall of some blokes house They arrested him for you illegally using somebody else's Wi-Fi.

He'd hacked into their passwords

It's a can of electronic worms.

And he's looking at six months, this guy, or a hefty fine.

So, you know, don't do anything.

Just don't.

Just whatever you're thinking of doing today, don't.

Put it down.

Here's De La Soul with Say No Go.

Let's get right on down to the skit A baby was brought into a world of piss And if we could've talked that soon in a delivery room It would've asked the nurse who I'd hit The reason for this?

The mother is a jerk, excuse me, junkie Was brought the work of the old into a new life, what a way But this what a way has been a way up to date Anyway, Push couldn't shove me to understand a path to a bay set Cause Shuma should've raced it in a first place

Y'all can't have none of that, tell her what to say, Mace

Word, word to the mother, I'll tell the truth, so bear my witness.

Blind like birds of a feather, dressed her like clever, you don't wanna wear it.

No need to ask that question, just don't mention, you know what the answer is.

Now I never fancied Nancy, but the statement she made held a plate of weight, I even stressed it to Wayne.

Did he take any heat?

Now the boy was hooked, you could phrase the word base, and the kid just

People say, what have I done for all my years?

My tears show my heart and work, I heard shoving is worse than pushing

Believe it or not, the plot forms a feat more than charity.

But the cost doesn't coincide with the ride of insanity.

Is it a chant that slant the soul to feel for it?

I know it's the border that forms the order to kill for it.

Standing, steaming on a young one Thinking it's time eight balls for a cool, cool player Racked it all, tried to break mischief Got beat by the boy in blue Next day you're out by the spot once more Looking hard for a crack in the hole I asked what's the fix for the ill stuff Word to the D-roll, the answer should've been no

Run me a score from the funky four, plus one more.

Rewind that back.

This is the age for a new stage of fiend.

Watch how the zombies scream, it's the crack.

Plain as plain, they should've slain it from the start.

Behind the ideals of cranking up the heart, now the base claims shock over every part.

Day Last Soul.

That sounds great, doesn't it?

It's wonderful stuff.

Still one of the all-time great hip-hop albums.

How many years later?

89.99.

2009, almost 20 years later.

It's amazing.

18 years later.

But it was never a particularly well-produced album.

What are you talking about?

I'm talking about the fact that it sounded as if it was recorded in a bucket much of it and you know because they made it all themselves in their bedrooms.

Yeah but on those terms it was incredibly well produced.

Well... I know what you mean it doesn't sort of sound expansive.

It's not beefy.

And it doesn't have all the knob twiddling going on.

Yeah, it's not beefy.

That's true in the way modern hip-hop albums are.

But in terms of the technical achievement... Yes, absolutely.

...it's extraordinary and it was revolutionary.

And kids, if you haven't got that album, you can buy it for about £4 now, I think.

Three, probably.

You're mad.

You should go and buy it today.

Whatever sort of music you like.

Exactly.

Everyone should own Three Feet High and Rising.

by De La Soul.

And it's actually got some semi-amusing talking bits in between the tracks.

Yeah, one of the first hip-hop albums to feature skits, which since became one of the most annoying features of hip-hop albums.

In fact, there's a kind of a phoning to be done on the worst possible skit on a hip-hop album.

But those were pretty good ones, even though they get quite tiresome after a few listens.

Yeah, yeah, and it's certainly not something you want to stick on a compilation, I wouldn't think.

No, but you can skip the, skip the... Skip the skits?

Skits, yeah.

Couldn't quite get my mouth round that this early in the morning.

Now we're talking about MySpace and, you know, that kind of thing.

Well, MySpace particularly.

Joe's very keen to boost his MySpace friend percentage.

Yes.

And he's almost at a thousand folks.

Yeah, come on.

Do you want to be friends with Joe Cornish?

log on to... There's very little to it.

Well, you can find it.

What do you do when you log on to... I find Myspace quite annoying.

And I'm thinking of shutting down my... You've got a Myspace as well, haven't you?

My account.

Well, I was told by an agent.

She said, because I was going to go over to America, the land of Coca-Cola and golden nuggets.

and um i was gonna go over to america and she said listen uh you need a myspace account because people you know in america they need to see the stuff you're doing you can post some of your videos there and it's easy for the agents just to log on to your myspace page and i said well i've got a blog she said no it's not the same

I said, well, it surely is the same.

You just type in the address of my blog and then you can see all my videos there.

No, they like MySpace right now.

So you need a MySpace page.

I bet she's not saying that anymore.

No.

Because in fact, MySpace is kind of over, isn't it?

You would think so.

It's all about Facebook.

How many, because you can only deal with one of these things at a time.

Like who, what Facebook freak, like Edgar Wright, your friend, our friend, is a, he used to be a MySpace.

He does both now.

Does he do both?

Does he maintain them in tandem?

What we're trying to think about here, listeners, is what's going to happen next in the world of electronic networking.

The innovation that Facebook brought to the table was that even if you weren't on it, you'd receive an email from a friend who was.

And with one click, suddenly you'd have a profile.

Right?

Yeah.

Facebook is kind of invasive.

It's like a virus.

YouTube does send you messages.

It's as if Facebook has a profile for you even though you don't know it.

Right.

And people are talking about you and inviting you and poking you.

It's like there's a party happening and someone's had a party in your name in their house.

Hey, there's a Joe Cornish party going on.

Come along, Joe Cornish.

What?

Okay then.

It's that kind of thing.

I don't understand though.

I got sucked into, I don't care about Facebook but yet I'm still on it.

You get sucked into it like an evil electronic tendril wrapping itself around your ankle.

But does Edgar do both of his pages?

Does he maintain them the whole time?

You don't have to really maintain Facebook do you?

You just have to respond.

You do kind of have to.

Some people maintain it.

Do they?

Some people spend ages on it.

Yeah he does both.

Yeah yeah yeah.

But what's the next one going to be?

What's going to supersede Facebook?

If you've got any thoughts on this text us on 64046.

You can email us adamandjoe.sixmusicatbbc.co.uk.

The guy that invented Facebook is 23.

He's a billionaire.

Yeah.

So there's someone out there who's going to have the next little tiny little incremental progressive idea to push this technology forward.

It could be you listening at home.

It could be you.

Text us in your ideas for the next step that interactive electronic websites should take and hey we can share some of the money Chum bucket what that would be the natural name.

That's the name next size true.

We got to start with a name Bebo Facebook it's got to be a kind of catchy name yak bag should we have some more music while we think yeah absolutely This is Emma Pollock with acid test

Does not feel like a home Is it occupied?

This life has no one that I own Do I dramatize?

These days I think I'll stay at home By the fireside Just leave the outdoors to get on While I theorize There is nothing here to celebrate

At least three times in a single week I am underground There is no warning I can't seek I am always found There is no right or reason to be

I just fall until it's got me.

If it fits, then wear it.

You can hear me as I cherish it.

I've carved your name out.

So you're blue.

I picked your city.

Think I need to shake up, wake up fast Forgive a little hope, I won't let it last But every little day that passes Something is fixing and something is broken This conversation is no longer token

BBC 6 Music.

Available right now for a good downloading.

Hello!

The Russell Howard and John Richardson podcast.

My name is John Richardson.

Their three hour Sunday show brutally cut down to 30 minutes.

Damn right.

Basically it's the best bits without the music.

James Blunt there.

You're beautiful too.

Which is probably for the best.

The Russell Howard and John Richardson podcast.

Download and subscribe for free at bbc.co.uk slash 6 music.

Hey this is Adam and Joe here on 6 Music.

We're filling in for Sean Keaveney.

He's away for one more week.

He's in Tuscany.

After this in Tuscany.

Yeah imagine.

Having a nice Tuscan time.

Tuscan raiders.

And yeah dealing with the sand people.

Is that what the Tuscan American football team are called?

Tuscan raiders.

Tuscan raiders and they're all Star Wars themed.

Do you think?

That's where sand people come from.

If they're not they're missing a trick.

Yeah.

So we were just talking about the kind of friends networking phenomenon that continues to reinvent itself online and wondering what would be next for the world of Myspaces and Facebooks and things like that.

We were thinking some kind of site where people post, scrawl an innuendo about you, right?

Yeah, using that Facebook mechanism of receiving an email

uh which kind of tantalizingly suggests that people are talking about you in another room uh you receive an email from this website what's it called this website well we had a couple of names we thought maybe uh jerk circle slag bucket so you receive an email it says uh um someone has slagged you off on slag bucket yeah or you're a jerk find out why on

Well you might have to offer them a little bit more it might say something like Roderick has said you're unreliable and stink on Slagbucket.

Click here to refute these claims.

Now you couldn't not refute those because as far as you're concerned on Slagbucket lots of people you know are gossiping in a malicious way about you and you'd have to intervene to to put it right.

Exactly I mean that's the backbone of the the whole internet.

is people ill-advisedly responding to things that have been said about them anyway.

Provocation.

And people can't resist, like people responding to all kinds of criticism.

Electric provocation.

That's my new album title.

That would be a lovely album title.

I'd buy that one.

And you know, you can't resist it.

As soon as you see something, I mean probably you and I have probably done ill-advised little bits of emailing in the past and I've certainly got into a couple of

Very, very bad contretemps on the internet.

It's a disaster area.

So, you know, carry on thinking, folks.

Give us some of your ideas for directions that these places could go in.

Yeah, what's the next step?

What's the next multi-billion pound website that'll convince us all to join it?

We could all get rich off this, you know.

Now, it's time for my session track.

This is a Peel session from 2001, and it's the White Stripes, one of John Peel's favourite bands.

And they're playing a track here called Lafayette Blues.

Enjoy.

Adams pick of the BBC archive.

Ride it, ride it, set it to rock and roll

All right, White Stripes, calm down.

Oh, it's a smash.

That's the White Stripes with Lafayette Blues from the John Peel Sessions.

This is Adam and Jo on the BBC.

Time now for the news read by Adrian and Harvey.

Digital radio.

Digital TV.

BBC Six Music.

And in 6music news, Kerrang!

winners out in force, Amy's Brawl and Killers have more in store.

It's 7.30, I'm Harvey Cook.

Good morning.

Detectives in Liverpool hunting the killer of 11-year-old Reece Jones say they're looking for a white boy aged between 13 and 15.

Reece's parents have made an emotional appeal for people to come forward with information about who may have shot their son, saying they'd lost their world and the world lost a good guy.

People know.

Someone knows who's done it.

And I know people must be frightened, but they've got to think that they can't leave this killer out there.

It could be their son, it could be their brother next time, because it'll happen again.

If he's not caught, it'll happen again.

My baby was only 11.

He didn't deserve this.

Also making six music news this morning, a senior doctor is warning that stroke patients in the UK are more likely to die or suffer serious disability than in other Western European countries.

Professor Hugh Marcus says that the UK provides inferior treatment despite spending the same amount on care.

One key thing seems to be that in Europe, stroke is treated much more than emergency and a lot of effort is put into treating the acute stroke patients, scanning them quickly, instituting treatment urgency.

The BBC has learnt the NHS has paid out more than £80 million in redundancy costs after merging strategic health authorities in England, which was set up only five years ago.

The number of parents complaining children have been taken from them unfairly has risen to record levels.

Campaigners say social workers are acting too hastily in many cases.

Prisoners have been evacuated from part of Maidstone Jowling, Kent after evidence of Legionella bacteria was found.

The bug was discovered in the prison's water supply.

The Hollywood actress Lindsay Lohan has been jailed for a day after pleading guilty to drink driving and drug charges.

She's also been ordered to do community service and complete a drug treatment program.

And the actress Nicole Ritchie has been released from Jowling, California after serving 82 minutes of a four-day sentence for driving under the influence of drugs.

Officials say she was freed early because of overcrowding and the weather were a lot of cloud around for southern and eastern England today the best of any sunshine in southwest England and Wales should be pretty much dry though the weather Sorry highs of 22 degrees in Cardiff 20 in London and 18 degrees in Belfast now with six music news Adrian Larkin

enter shikari came up trumps at the karang rock awards last night then two awards in total for them there was one that we would have gagged to have got it would have been best live live performance and that's what we did get the lads reckon they don't need a big budget to win over the crowds on stage that's after they beat masters muse to the mantle doesn't matter if you're what size venue what amount of equipment you've got behind you if you've got passionate and energetic music you know you can like you can still win that guys

Meanwhile lost profits were named best British band, and newcomers went to gallows the lads from Hertfordshire have already signed to a major and reckon they're flying right now.

To prove how good he is, I think that's five out of six of his bands have just won the latest British newcomers award, so anyone who wants to give him the most jokes amount of money, he's just done five out of six of them.

Now pick up the papers this morning and it's Amy Winehouse all over some of the tabloids.

This time she's been photographed with bruises and cuts on her face, apparently from a brawl she had with her husband.

And the Killers have a series of songs to release this year.

Bran and Flowers and co reckon a collection of B-sides and an X-mas single are all on the cards.

That's six music news, your next bulletin's at eight.

The indie disco A-Z special reaches the letter T, and we open the doors to some more listener top trumpeting.

Join me, Gideon Co, after A&J from Ten.

It's all my natural emotions You make me feel under

Fall in love with someone Ever fallen in love, in love with someone Ever fallen in love, in love with someone You should have fallen in love with I can't see much of the future Unless we find out what's to blame, what is shame Can we one get together much stronger Unless we realize

And I fall in love with someone And I fall in love, in love with someone And I fall in love, in love with someone You shouldn't have fallen in love with You disturb my natural emotions You make me feel under the hoods And I'm hurt And if I start a commotion I'll only end it

Is someone

I'm in love in love with someone you should've fallen in love with

Well, that's a good question.

I suppose the answer would have to be yes.

That's the Buzzcocks with Ever Fallen in Love.

And this is Adam and Joe here on the BBC covering for Sean Keveny on BBC6 music.

Yeah, good morning.

Hope you're feeling all happy and perky this morning, ready for the amazing weekend that's coming up, the big bank holiday.

Three days of pure enjoyment and sunshine.

We've been promised sunshine.

Yeah, there's going to be sunshine here in London.

And as I keep saying, Adam, it has been sunny in the rest of the country.

That's what you say.

But we're broadcasting nationally now.

It's important to embrace the rest of the country and not be too London-centric.

It has been sunny like in a couple of places, but generally the weather has not been great in the UK over the last week.

But it is going to be an amazing weekend.

Right.

Yeah?

And the best thing is you got Monday off.

So imagine what Sunday night's going to be like.

Yeah.

It's gonna be a crazy party.

Everyone's gonna be naked, drunk, throwing their own doings at the wall.

That's my kind of party.

It's gonna be incredible.

The house is gonna be messed up.

The car's gonna be driven through the neighbour's front room.

People won't wash.

No, there'll be tents on the roof.

Slates missing.

Sink pulled out of the thing.

Yeah.

rude words written in lipstick on your mum's bum it's gonna be off the hook man that's you've described my ideal party sunday night yeah yes and my what oh yeah absolutely can't wait it's the mum's bum thing that you you like most now i'm thinking of what i'm gonna write

Because there's enough room there to write quite a bit.

Poor old mum.

So listen, we've been discussing what the next step forward will be in the internet social website networking phenomenon.

That's the correct phrase, isn't it?

Yes.

Internet social networking phenomenon.

The INFP.

We had the idea for, what was it called?

Slagbucket.

Jerk Circle or Slagbucket or Slagbag.

Yeah, where you receive a provocative email in your inbox informing you that people you don't know or slightly know are talking about you in a malicious way on a website that you then feel compelled to log on to and join, because who wouldn't?

Here's another idea I've had.

CGI technology, virtual paintings have taken massive steps forward.

It's easy to do.

A toddler can do it now.

In fact, toddlers made Shrek 3, wrote it and made it.

So I hear.

I believe so, they were subnormally intelligent.

But anyway, it's so easy now that I think a good idea would be to start a website where people who aren't you, but that know you, make a naked you.

Right, they're called Frankensteins on the internet.

It's called yourbits.com.

Yeah.

An avatar of you has been created on yourbits.com.

So somewhere there's a naked picture of you with all your details, all your circles, triangles and tubes on display.

All the geometric shapes laid out for all to see.

You couldn't not click on that.

So this is actually this is not the same as a Frankenstein because a Frankenstein is just your face grafted onto somebody else's body.

But you're talking about constructing a nudie from scratch.

Yeah, right.

Yeah.

Telling all.

Yeah.

So they've taken pictures of you.

No, no, they haven't.

It's imaginary.

No, but listen, they've taken pictures of you.

And they've sort of constructed from with a CGI model what you would look like without clothes.

Exactly.

Right.

So so it's sort of realistic.

yeah oh no it's photo realistic and they've posed you in a revealing pose yeah maybe with a celebrity or something now how could you not click onto that and the thing is to access that picture you've got to put in your details you've got to log in deets and that's the key with something like facebook you log in to see what people have said about you and then you're hooked you're hooked you're in the web yeah so both of those are brilliant ideas what would you call that one listeners uh bits box

Bit torrent.

Yeah something like that.

If you've got ideas listeners please text us in 64046 obviously we're getting hundreds of texts but it would be true to say that between seven and eight in the morning when our listenership are a bit groggy we don't get as many texts as we do later in the show so yours is almost guaranteed to be read out.

But if I'm making it sound like we're not getting any, that's wrong.

Because we're getting millions.

Millions.

Music now.

This is Arcade Fire with Neighborhood number two.

Come on, you can do it!

Don't ask for something

neighborhood

BBC 6 Music It has long been rumoured in showbiz circles that there was once a game of Top Trumps between Morrissey, Bruce Forsyth, Roland Ratt and Adolf Hitler.

Well, there was one other at the Green Bay's table that night.

None other than I, Harry Hill.

I have remained silent for too long and at last tell my story in the world premiere of my long-awaited concept album.

The story of the first meeting of the International Recipe Card Top Trump Society.

There you go, there's something else to look forward to on Bank Holiday Monday, Harry Hill's show.

That's sure to be great.

It'll be fantastic.

It's Adam and Joe on BBC 6 Music, it's quarter to eight in the morning, and it's Friday, so you know, you just gotta get through today, then it's fun time.

Crackerjack.

Crackerjack time.

Yeah.

Exactly.

No excuse to be miserable today.

No, exactly.

If you're miserable today, then I hate you.

That's a bit much.

What if something terrible's happened?

No, I went too far.

Yeah.

Okay, it's time for my session, Track.

And this morning, here's some associates.

This is from John Peel, Radio One session on the 28th of April, 1981.

What were you doing on the 28th of April, 1981, Adam?

You know, you've actually got diaries, haven't you, Adam Buxton?

Yeah, but not from the... Well, I was writing a diary.

Not from 81?

That would be a cool thing to do when you play session tracks on the show.

You could give us a flashback to what you were doing on the day that session was recorded.

My diaries are a little bit erratic.

Around then I was writing a story on a roll of lavatory paper.

Were you really?

Yeah, on a pink roll.

Like the Marquis de Sade.

Is that what he did?

Yeah, he wrote his erotic doings on a toilet roll in prison during the French Revolution.

There you go.

There you go, fact fans.

Well, I was doing something very similar and I was sporting a couple of parallel scratches on my cheek that I got from running through some bushes.

And you thought you looked a bit like Adam Ant.

You looked a lot like Adam Ant.

And I thought, I'm the coolest.

And when the scars started to fade,

I was very much tempted to deepen them.

You know that's a potential text the nation isn't it?

Visible injuries that after they stopped hurting you were actually quite happy with.

Like Bruce Willis in Die Hard 4.0 he's got a ludicrous set of scratches that are just designed to look cool.

Yeah or Harrison Ford's scar on his chin.

Yeah.

That's one of the hallmarks of a successful Hollywood action hero is to be able to be scarred in a sexy way.

Sexy and scarred.

So anyway, here's some associates from April 1981.

This is a track called Me, Myself and the Tragic Story.

Joe's pick of the BBC archive.

Oh dearie me.

Oh dear, if that hasn't woken you up nothing will.

That's The Associates recorded for John Peel on Radio 1 on the 28th of April 1981.

It's a track called Me, Myself and the Tragic Story.

We can't figure out whether that comes off an Associates album or whether that's a track that only really existed live or maybe a b-side or something.

It sounds as if they may have just made it up.

As on the spot, they only ever played it once.

Yeah.

So...

You don't understand the associates.

They're good, man.

They're a great band.

Do text us or email us if you know the source of that track.

But it was a good one, wasn't it?

It was pretty... It was hardcore associates.

It had some pretty nuts.

Delightful nuts.

Now, we've been asking you to text us in with your suggestions for the next step that the phenomenon... Phenomenon.

Phenomenon.

Ah, I'm so tired.

What the next step that social networking sites will take?

Carry on talking Adam, please.

One of the beds come in to try and give us a bit of pep.

Emergency!

Fade up the bed!

Get James Brown in please!

It's like the radio equivalent of one of those pulmonary heart restart things.

What are they called?

Yes, yes, those shocker things.

I can't think, my brain normally doesn't even start working until about two in the afternoon.

Well you know, listeners, we're almost at the halfway point in our two week stint filling in for Shaun Keeney and it's been a bit of a cold shower for us getting up this early and trying to be like lucid.

You know, because it's like, I've got up early in my life before, right?

Yeah.

Because every now and again you have to, maybe to catch a plane or something like that.

Yeah, or if you're filming something for telly you have to get up terribly early.

But not day after day.

Not today!

Like maybe three times in a row, that's the most it's ever happened to me.

For us it's like a kind of David Blaine art magic experiment isn't it?

It's like we're trapped in a sort of glass box suspended over central London

uh very early every morning and like through the and i feel like i'm jet lagged the rest of the day and and my groggy brain just gets little snatches of things that i said on this radio show coming back to me and just some of the malformed mangled rubbish sentences that i've come out with just come back to haunt me throughout the rest of the day but you're not

know what the vast majority of people who listen between 7 and 10 will probably be getting up this early regularly I know exactly I think we're a couple of spoiled mollycoddled yeah I don't know what the word would be dicks very possibly the word I don't think so I don't think that would be the word yeah

Um, anyway, should we have a little bit more music?

Yeah, okay.

While we punish you for saying that.

Oh, come on, I'm allowed that.

Are we gonna have some Edwin Collins?

Yeah, this is, uh, Edwin Collins' terrific new single, I love this one, it's called You'll Never Know.

Was torn into More than a little confused Am I her yesterday's view?

And even though I can't forget you My head won't let you

Very good, isn't it?

That's Edwin Collins' new single, You'll Never Know.

I just love hearing his voice.

It's like hearing the voice of an old friend.

That's true, isn't it?

He was the soundtrack of many of our favourite youthful moments.

Yes.

All of which are gone now.

We were very old.

We've been asking you listeners to email in with your suggestions of how social networking sites will progress in the future, how we can all make millions of pounds like the child who invented Facebook, who's now living in a massive house made out of jelly beans.

So here is some of the stuff what you've texted in.

First of all, dear Adam and Joe, please read this text out.

Love from Andy and Amanda.

That's a good one.

Thanks Andy and Amanda.

I done it.

Here's another one.

Is that all I have to say?

Please read this out.

I thought that deserved to be read out.

It's blunt cheekiness attracted me.

Ok here's one that's on topic.

The site would be called nosebag.

It would open your emails for you and spread rumours about you.

That's quite a good one isn't it you just get an email saying nosebag has intercepted your emails and cc'd them to the following people.

Yeah that's quite good.

Yeah and in order to stop that happening you'd have to log on to nosebag and that nosebag would have you it would be able to start selling advertising and the inventor of nosebag would be a billionaire.

yeah yeah and it's also not totally dissimilar to what happens already except in reverse because you know a lot of the time you find yourself getting emails saying somebody has sent you a message on facebook so you have to log into facebook to see the message that they could have just emailed to you in the first place

Dear me.

You know what I'm saying?

Sorry I got a little angry.

You were angry about that.

A little furious there.

But you know like all you've done is double the time it takes you to read a message.

I know.

Someone has made the point that Facebook is just the internet anyway.

It's just the internet called Facebook and controlled by Facebook.

There's nothing that Facebook does that can't just be generally done on the internet.

Well it narrows the field doesn't it?

It makes it more localised so that it's just that you're just the people that presumably you once bumped into that you're dealing with.

Dominic has taken on our idea of the the bits and bobs.com the site that would create a a naked avatar of you that you'd be compelled to log on to check the size of your been nude you He says I like the bits idea.

Could it be like Wikipedia?

So anybody who's genuinely seen you naked could edit the photos so they become more and more accurate That's it.

So you have your nude avatar and it would say yesterday.

This nude avatar was edited by Trish who you

slept with when you were 22 and she's made your winkle smaller.

That's right.

Trish remembers that you had an unsightly birthmark in your left inner thigh.

Exactly.

Which she has added to you.

That's a very good idea Dominic.

Very good.

Here's one more final one.

This is my favourite from Erin in Radcliffe.

The next big internet thing will be a mashup of MySpace and Facebook called sit on my Facebook.

right how is that a mashup of myspace and facebook i don't know let's ask the news readers because it's time for news on bbc6 music read by catherine and adrian digital radio digital tv bbc6 music the top story is at eight i'm catherine cracknell the parents of 11 year old reese jones shot dead in niverport on wednesday have pleaded for help in finding his killer detectives are looking for a white youth age between 13 and 15

A senior doctor says stroke treatment has to be improved in the UK.

Professor Hugh Marcus warns Britain has the worst record on stroke victims in Western Europe.

And the number of parents complaining their children have been unfairly taken from them and adopted has risen to record levels.

Campaigners say social workers have acted incorrectly in more than 100 cases.

And the weather best at the sunshine in Wales and the West Country today.

Elsewhere, quite a bit of cloud around

with possibly some light rain in southeast England, highs into the late teens, early 20s.

Adrian Larkin's got the six music news.

Our top story this hour, rock's finest, a couple of Hollywood stars and a monkey made it to last night's Kerrang!

Awards.

Enta Shikari picked up two trophies whilst 30 Seconds to Mars won best single for the kill.

We'll be hearing from some of those winners in the next Bulletin at 8.30.

BBC.

Six.

Music.

BBC Six Music Closer to the music that matters Here she comes, a summer in her heels You can meet her at the station to escape for a day She wants to know existence exists So you take her to the places that the tourists never see

You lift her up and feel yourself full You feel so proud beside her while you walk a little taller She's a beatific vision the world can see She's got your tongue tied, got your heart skipping beats I don't know what it is

Oh, when I ramble around I can tell you in my life She's the best I've found You walk together through the lanes and the parks Wrap her in the evening till the stars come out

The afterlife is what you leave behind Gonna leave a lot of footprints, gonna take a lot of time I don't know what it is she's got, let's go with me

scientific visions entwined in one another there she goes with summer in the air

There she goes with summer in her hair?

Yeah.

Is that a track by Timotei?

Mmm.

Yeah, that's Beatific Visions.

Does Timotei still exist?

I don't know if it does, you know.

Timotei!

I think it might have been phased out.

Really?

Because they found that it wasn't real sunshine they were using.

Really?

Yeah.

What were they using?

Just nuclear bits?

Yeah, all they'd done was fried up some drizzle.

Really?

Yeah.

And they'd kind of blasted it with neutrons.

You're so clever.

You're so clever, you know everything.

I do know everything, I'm like Stephen Fry.

Hey this is Adam and Joe, this is BBC6 music, it's five past eight, it's the middle of our exciting breakfast show, it's a Friday, so it couldn't be more exciting here in the studio.

If only it wasn't so early, that's the only thing, struggling a little bit.

But we are going to talk to Ben right now because he's our serial thriller today.

He's picked out a couple of tracks for us.

Ben Kelly, that's a good name.

Ben, are you there?

Good morning, Adam.

Good morning, Joe.

Hey, you sound like a sensible, level-headed kind of a person.

Well, thank you very much.

And you should be, because you work for American Express.

Yes, I do, for my sins, yes.

What kind of things do you do for them?

What will you be doing when you go into the office today, Ben?

Looking on the internet, probably.

And do you spend a lot of time just goofing off and pretending to work and just looking at stuff on YouTube?

You see that's a good answer.

He's saying yes, but in a way that doesn't compromise his employment.

Yeah, cuz someone from work might be listening.

They can't fire you retrospectively.

Boss is on holiday, nice.

Favourite film, Ben, can we ask you?

I think it's Midnight Express.

Oh now that's a great film.

It is a great it's it's it's a weird film to have to have as your favourite though because it's quite do you like watch it and you know over and over again do you come home and think oh I really fancy seeing a man molested in the shower a traumatic drugs bust and then somebody speared through the back of the head by a by a clothes peg.

Really, well they're the three top moments in that film.

Come on, what's the fourth top moment is when he gets a visit from his girlfriend and he's at such a sorry position in his life that I won't go into.

Yeah, kids if you haven't seen Midnight Express it's

It's an ideal film to watch when you're about 14, isn't it?

Yes.

And when you sort of don't know that that kind of thing ever went down in the world.

So there's two recommendations for younger listeners.

De La Soul's Three Feet High and Rising and a copy of Midnight Express.

Directed by Alan Parker and tragically the star of that film is no longer alive.

He died very young.

Now what's he called?

What is he called?

Do you know that Ben?

yeah it's not Brian Keith somebody Billy something someone can text us that we'll find out for a favorite film it's surprising you don't know the name of the lead actor very strange disappointed with you better you've actually seen the film

never seen in my life that's what I thought and you went go-karting last weekend he's not six you did you said that and you went go-karting last weekend he is he's a genius six-year-old who works for American Express advising them on how to make the company more attractive to six-year-old was it did you win the go-karting I was rubbish I thought all those years of Mario Kart would have paid dividends

Really on my stag weekend.

We went go-karting.

I was excited about it I think I may have come second or even one I got really competitive Joe had a little kind of brain fart and I'm with Ben and cuz I play a lot of Mario Kart as well Yeah, I was hoping it would translate to the real world.

It doesn't know.

No, what do you have anything to fire?

He was puttering along at the back

You got really terrified, did you get frightened Ben?

I did, I had a little skid mark.

That's not a very nice thing to say.

On the actual track we're assuming.

Yeah, there you go.

Now what music have you picked out for us today Ben?

I've got Primal Spring Loaded and Granddaddy Crystal Lake.

Oh Crystal Lake, that's a lovely track.

Does that have anything to do with the Friday the 13th films?

Crystal Lake.

Because of course it's Camp Crystal Lake where they all get chopped up.

Isn't it Ben?

Does that have anything to do with that?

It may well do, listen carefully to the lyrics.

We're going to play that one first but thank you very much indeed Ben.

Thanks guys, have a great weekend.

Yeah same to you.

Here's the Friday the 13th noise.

There you go and this is Granddaddy with Crystal Lake.

you

We should never have left the crystal lake The party's full of folks and flake Italian leather winter games Retired by the dirt flames The crystal lake, it only laughs It knows you're just a model man It's shining like a chain

And find my way again I've lost my way

She never left the crystal lake For areas where trees are fake And dogs are dead with broken hearts Clapsing by the coffee cart

It's the crystal lake, it only lasts Knows you're just a modern man It's shining like a chandelier Shining somewhere far away from here

and find my way again I've lost my way again

Adam and Joe on 6music.

We want to be free.

We want to be free to do what we want to do.

And we want to get loaded.

And we want to have a good time.

And that's what we're gonna do.

We're gonna have a good time.

We're gonna have a party.

I don't wanna lose you now I don't wanna lose you now

Just what is it that you want to do?

The new football season on the BBC.

Already a day of reckoning.

And he's pointed to the spot.

Never a penalty in a million years.

For the life of me, I understand why you gave the decision.

Sven is a good club manager.

It was one of the great performances I've seen in any day.

There we go, that was this week's serial thriller courtesy of Ben Kelly,

Thanks a lot Ben nice choices.

We were talking about where the sample came from in the primal scream track loaded and It was Peter Fonda in a film called the wild angel all about bikers I think he made it before easy rider.

I think did he done it He did done it before and he writer I think and that was a little sample from it there So thanks a lot Ben.

Yeah good tracks

yeah and hello we're Adam and Joe this is BBC six music it's just coming up to 20 past 8 we're doing the breakfast show this week we've done it all this week it's all sorted love should take another week invoice will be in the post we'll be out don't use it for a couple of days let it settle don't worry Keven will be back yeah we'll be here for about another week do you want me to sweep that up?

yeah it's not a problem we can paint we can fix all that guarantee for two years have you been having dreams about your builders again no no i was telling adam i had a bizarre dream the other day where i was very angry with with my builder friend who's uh adam and i used the same builder he's a lovely guy yeah i've got no reason to be angry with him no but in this dream i was furious with him he'd uh completely re-wallpapered a wall that i didn't want re-wallpapering you idiot i was so angry yeah

I just must be angry about something else.

In your dream, when you were angry with him, were you expressing your anger in a manly way or were you a little bitch?

Was your voice cracking and were you sort of shaking and being a bit of a lady?

No, I just get dreams where I'm just full of furious energy and frustration, basically.

Frustration.

Right.

That's what my life's all about.

Yeah, because you're keeping it all buttoned up.

Keeping it all in.

Keeping it all in and then in your dreams you turn into it.

Not always, not every night.

Most nights!

But not every night.

Anyway, you're not allowed to talk about your dreams.

It's boring, right?

It is a little bit boring.

Yeah.

Now, listeners, we're going to be doing Text the Nation, which has become one of Britain's most loved

uh interactive things it's britain's favorite feature it's britain's favorite feature in the tv quick awards yeah it's been nominated for a mobo britain's favorite feature yeah it's an exciting feature that in which we do what we've done all through the show invite your texts but this time with a jingle

Yeah, is that good enough?

That is what people like.

That's what people want.

So that's exciting and we've got a really kind of slightly cheesy theme to text in on a sort of good stupid breakfast show type thing.

Yeah exactly because normally of course the level of debate and interaction here is highly intellectual.

It's very highbrow but we're going to be a little trivial today for you.

But before that

How about some more block rockin' beats from those Chemical Brothers?

Although the track is not block rockin' beats, that was a bad introduction because it used the name of one of their other tracks.

Anyway, this is called the Salmon Dance.

So how about some salmon dancing from the Chemical Brothers?

That's what I mean.

Hello, boys and girls.

My name is Fatlip, and this is my friend, Samminas salmon.

Today, we're going to teach you some fun facts about salmon and a brand new dance.

to a brand new dance.

I know you're gonna love it if you give it one chance.

It's not complicated.

It's not too hard.

You don't even have to be a hip hop star.

See, anyone can do it.

All you need is style.

Listen up, P-Gang.

I'ma show you how.

Put your hands to the side, as silly as it seems, and shake your body

Deeps spent part of their life in frontal water and part of their life in salt water.

Wow.

Very good.

We change rats a couple of days after spawning, then we die.

When I first did the salmon, all the people just laughed.

They looked around and stood like I was on fire.

I heard somebody say out loud, what the fuck is that?

This dude been dancing like a fish while he's doing the snap.

But the more I kept doing it, the more they be feeling it.

And then I heard some distressing.

of the night everyone was on my team and the whole club was dancing like the salmon for him

which is even more keen than that of a dog or a bear.

Wow.

My family also rely on ocean currents, tides, gravitational pull of the moon.

Off to the moon.

Fish pay attention to the moon.

Wow.

Look here.

Did you know?

What?

That I could go to Japan and back

Wow.

Hey, kids.

Hey, give it up for Sammy the Salmon and his amazing salmon dance.

What do you say?

All right.

Who's hungry?

Me, I'm hungry.

That's the Chemical Brothers with the Salmon Dance and that features Fatlip.

Is that the Fatlip formerly of The Far Side?

I think it must be, yeah.

It must be.

Listeners, Fatlip is a bit of a genius.

He was the lead rapper type person of a fantastic hip hop group called The Far Side who sadly split up after making a couple of amazing albums.

But he did release a solo album in America only that I bought a couple of copies of.

A couple of copies of when I was last over there and it's brilliant.

all the tracks are too sweary so I've never been able to play them on the radio right but fat lip is a genius what's it called the album I can't remember oh yeah I can't remember I'll find out for you in a second I do love it though it's one of those albums that I love so much I never really paid attention to the title you ever get that you just stick it in and stick it in iTunes and

Kind of forget what it's called, especially in the computer age.

Certainly when you load stuff onto your titles are almost becoming, um, what's the word up obsolescence obsolete, irrelevant.

Yeah.

And that's a bit of a, sort of, it sounds a bit like a nerd track as well as a track.

It's a weird sort of amalgam of fashionable, uh, uh, you know, uh, music styles by the chemical brothers.

Yeah.

He says, you feel in me, that's, that's a new street phrase, isn't it?

No.

You feel in me?

No.

Are you feeling me?

No.

Why?

What?

Because that's the oldest street phrase.

You feelin' me?

I only just heard that watching Prison Break the other day.

Really?

Yeah.

How long's that been around?

40,000 years.

40,000 years?

No one ever tells me anything.

You feelin' me?

No, I'm not feeling you.

What are you talking about?

Now listen, just before 8.30 we're gonna play you a special track which is the Rebel Playlist winner from Steve LaMax Show.

Can you explain all this business, Adam?

No.

Steve Lomac has he gets people to vote for tracks that are not currently on the six music playlist and they sort of vote against each other and then the the winner of that gets on the playlist and gets played all the time so this is the winner it's by Lou Rhodes it's the Rainer I think this has probably been voted for by a lot of very anxious women ladies lady it's lady music listen to this

And angels' wings on his back Angered and troubled by so much that's out there And struggling not to paint it black But the rain will come and wash it down

And watch it all the way You bring the sun And he lives all alone out by the main wheel Only dreams for company But at night he flies high up to the skies

And he dreams of a girl with a moon in her eyes And fire in her heart And one day he'll find his way to heaven

We'll come and wash it all away

Blue Roads with the rain, this is Adam and Joel on BBC6Music, a kind of female Travis Bickle there, waiting for the rain to come and wash all the scum off the streets.

And I said before that because it had won the Rebel playlist on Steve LaMax's show, it was now part of the 6Music playlist.

Wrong.

Entirely wrong.

Listen, I can't tell you how sorry I am about that mistake.

It's not part of the... You've misled thousands of innocent children.

It's part of the rebel playlist.

That's why it's called the rebel playlist, you idiot!

That huge mistake will probably be an item on the news which is now coming up with Adrian and Catherine.

And in Six Music News... We've got the winners from the Kerrang!

Awards, why Amy's cut up and another wet festival gets going.

It's 8.30 and Catherine Cracknell, the parents of 11-year-old Reece Jones, who was shot dead in Liverpool on Wednesday night, say his killer must be caught.

Melanie and Stephen Jones want people to come forward with information.

Merseyside police are looking for a white boy about 5 foot 8 and between 13 and 15.

Fiona Trott is in Croxteth Forest.

She says police are appealing for people to text them with information.

Set up a special

mobile phone service for teenagers to get in touch with them with any information as to who the killer might be because as we know the police said yesterday they believe the killer is just between 13 and 15 years old and they're trying to encourage people to come forward anonymously.

In another six music news a police car has been shot at in Gloucestershire.

The shots came from a BMW which then sped off southbound down the M5.

No one was hurt but the M5 has been closed between junctions 12 and 13.

The number of parents claiming their children have been wrongly taken away from them and put up for adoption has reached record levels, as according to a BBC investigation.

Campaigners and MPs say there are more than 100 cases.

John Waite is presenter of Radio 4's Face the Facts, which carried out the investigation.

He says critics are pointing the finger at government targets aimed at increasing adoptions.

The number of babies being taken into care then adopted has doubled and critics say that's because social workers in trying to meet these new adoption targets are rushing cases and so some children are being removed unnecessarily from their families.

A top doctor said stroke victims should get better treatment.

Dr Hugh Marcus says care in the UK is badly organised and patients are much more likely to die here than in other parts of Europe.

A member of staff at Maidstone prisons reportedly having tests for Legionnaires disease.

Part of the Kent jail has been evacuated after the bug was found in the water supply.

And Hollywood actress Lindsay Lohan's been sent to jail for one day.

She's pleaded no contest to charges of cocaine possession and drunken driving.

She wants to spend three years on probation, serve 10 days of community service and attend 18 months of an alcohol education program.

And the weather.

The western Wales getting most of the sunshine.

Bit cloudier and more drizzly in the southeast and western Scotland.

Eyes into the late teens or early 20s.

6 Music news now.

Here's Adrian Larkin.

BBC 6 Music.

Enter Shaqari were the big winners at the Kerrang Awards in London last night.

There was one that we would have gagged to have got.

It would have been best live performance and that's what we did get.

Well they got two in the end out of a possible four.

It was Gallows who got named best newcomers and they never had any doubts about it.

We've been in the States so we haven't even been here and it's obviously you know we did the hard work when it needed to be done.

We're firming everyone's mind that we are the best British newcomer and you know we didn't even have to be in the country for two months before the awards and we still won it.

And from young to old then veteran rockers Judas Priest cat off the evening celebrations they dropped by to pick up the Hall of Fame award.

We've been making metal, British metal, for close to 40 years and it's a remarkable achievement.

I mean you're in a room with a lot of all of these new young talented players and you see that kind of response when you walk up there.

It's just nice, you know.

Some other news in brief now and it's Amy Winehouse all over the tabloids again this morning.

This time she's been photographed with cuts and bruises on her face after reports she got involved in a brawl with her husband.

And finally the Reading and Leeds festivals get going today as we've been reporting all week some of the site in Reading is still flooded.

So if you are heading there later, organisers are warning people to be prepared for wet conditions.

Plus, it's worth checking out our website which has details of the new camping and car parking areas as things have changed a bit.

That's 6 Music News, next for Listens at 9.

So let's go.

Stay spent with the grass and sun.

I don't mind.

To pretend a tune seems really dumb.

It seems really dumb.

As the morning comes, crawling through the blinds.

I shouldn't be up at this time.

But I can sleep with you there by my side.

Wake up, it's a beautiful morning Feel the sun shining through your eyes Wake up, it's a beautiful morning 25, don't wake all the time I felt this alive So wake up blue, there's so many things

Do anything, anything

For the death of summer But you can't blame me, no For the death of summer What you gonna say?

What you wanna say?

Wake up it's a beautiful morning Feel the sun shining for your eyes

We were joking about playing that yesterday.

We were.

We were referring to it as a sort of a breakfast show cliche.

We're playing it.

Yeah.

That's the Boo Radleys with Wake Up Boo.

That was amongst our list of songs that would be great to wake up to yesterday.

Other ones I thought of were Sixpence, None the Richer.

This was a list of cliche songs.

Fairground Attraction, Perfect.

So maybe Sixpence, None the Richer will be in the playlist on Monday.

But now, listeners, it's time for our most in fact the nation's favourite radio feature.

Here's the jingle.

Text the nation.

Text, text, text.

Text the nation.

What if I don't want to?

Text the nation.

But I'm using email.

Is that a problem?

It doesn't matter.

Text!

You know what, it's probably illegal to say it's Britain's favourite feature, especially as this is the BBC, the big British castle.

That's true.

You can probably be had up on charges and led away from the studio.

No, but it's such a nebulous statement anyway.

Yeah.

I mean, people use it all the time.

Because it's impossible to prove.

The nation's favourite, in fact the BBC use it all the time.

Right.

The nation's favourite poem, that sort of business.

Yes.

It's not the nation, it's just whoever happens to text in.

That's right.

And I think there's a sort of unspoken understanding that it's a load of bullies.

Do British Airways still call themselves the world's favourite airline?

No, in fact they call themselves the worst, the world's least favourite airline.

Now, they've spent millions of pounds on focus groups and that was the conclusion the focus group came up with, the world's least favourite airline.

And now on the tails of their planes, they've got a picture of a miserable middle-aged woman with two toddlers sitting on a suitcase.

In fact, she's not sitting on a suitcase because they lost it.

Anyway, you get the general idea.

That's not to say that they are the worst airline.

They're no better or worse than any other airline.

These are not the opinions of the big British castle.

They are merely the opinions of Joseph Murray Cornish.

Giving away my middle name there.

Sorry, mate.

Anyway, okay, so it's text the nation time and this is an important event here on the show where we ask you to text us in on a subject of our choosing.

It's a sort of a national survey.

The results are then given to the government who make various policy decisions based on them.

Yeah, they amend the books.

That's true.

Parliament will be buzzing about the results of this this afternoon.

And this afternoon today this afternoon what hello this morning.

We're asking you to text in Like foods that you dislike for absolutely no reason at all first sort of infantile reasons Is it food just food or well?

We're gonna start with food We can broaden it to other infantile things But yesterday my girlfriend and lovely partner asked me whether I like rice pudding and blue She said do you like rice pudding?

Yeah, and I thought no I don't know who does and she said why not?

And I thought, I thought, why don't I like rice pudding?

And I realized that I hadn't thought about rice pudding since I was about four or five and had taken a kind of tactical, meaningless decision to dislike it.

And you know the only reason I could come up with?

Because it looks like maggots in milk.

That's a good reason.

Yeah, or frog spawn.

Exactly.

And that infantile attitude to rice pudding I've clung to for the last 59 years.

Check this out.

Not only does it look like frog spawn, it looks like frog spawn.

with a poo crust.

How's that for you?

Well that's how old rice pudding does once it forms a crust.

No but some people like it with the crust don't they?

So what we're asking you listeners to do is to text us 64046 or email us adamandjoe at six music one no hang on a second adamandjoe dot six music at bbc.co.uk text us with food stuffs that you dislike for no good reason at all we're not interested in you having an allergy.

We're not interested in you like having had some kind of traumatic accident based with the food We want completely spurious reasons like I don't like tomatoes cause I can't tell whether they're a fruit or a vegetable They're just too squishy.

They're too squishy.

They explode like a little man's head.

Mmm

when you when you bite into them well my my my big problem is cheese of course and I'm in the in the position now where I'm still going to dinner parties once in a while and having to explain why you don't like exactly and the reason why don't you like cheese it smells of socks it smells of socks that's why because it smells of death and socks and I'm not having it

Yeah, so text in your highly immature reasons for disliking a particular food.

64046 is the number.

Here's some music.

This is, isn't it?

We're doing a swap around here.

This is Calvin Harris with Merrymaking at my place.

Come into my house You're invited into my house Entering the back of my house Welcoming you into my house Come into my house You're invited into my house Entering the back of my house Welcoming you into my house I've invited loads to my house Loads of people come to my house Let them drink inside of my house Make them smoke outside of my house

Well I've seen it before, lots of people at my front door Lots of people in my front door, trying to get into my house Well I've seen it before, lots of people in my front door Lots of people at my front door, trying to get into my house

of a merry making.

I'm a piece, baby, I'm a piece

I've got tables and chairs in my house.

I've got a stinky cat in my house.

I've got a brand new love in my house.

I've got a lovely bed in my house.

I've got...

Hello, this is Element Joe, BBC6 Music on The Breakfast Show.

It's just gone quarter to nine.

That was Calvin Harris with, what was it called again?

Mary Making It My Place.

Yeah.

Reminds me a little bit of Flight of the Conchords.

Really?

Yeah.

Now, Flight of the Conchords listeners, if you don't know about them, they're from New Zealand.

They're a comedy duo.

They're the latest big thing.

They've got a show on HBO.

You can download their radio shows, right?

Can you?

Yeah.

Nautily, maybe.

Maybe nautily.

You can also check out their HBO program on BitTorrent.

It's well worth having a look at.

That's naughty as well.

I think it's going to be... There's clips on YouTube, right?

Put Flight of the Concord into YouTube and you'll see their stuff.

They're really funny.

It's going to be on BBC4 later this year, I think.

and it's well worth looking at if BBC 4 isn't closed down thanks to the budget cuts that's another couple of uh ones yeah um welcome to text the nation the nation's favorite uh feature breakfast uh show feature i've qualified it slightly there a bit

the nation's favorite feature yeah okay that's what it is okay we've been asking you what foodstuffs you dislike for completely immature and nonsensical reasons do you want to hear some of the responses what we've got yeah well i'll give you another example just before we do i've got a problem with cauliflower yes because it looks like brains

It's like eating the brain.

You know the ironic thing is it's amazingly good for you.

It's a power food.

It's brain food.

It probably is brains.

Is it really good for you?

It's veggie brains.

Yeah it is.

Because it's just like white broccoli isn't it?

Or is that brussel sprouts?

Is it brussel sprouts that are incredibly good for you?

Anything green and sort of raw is really good for you.

Yeah but it's white though.

Cauliflower is like white broccoli and it's pointless it doesn't taste.

Well that's good man because what we're looking for is it's completely irrational.

Reasons don't like it.

So here's one from Dave.

He says I hate curry.

It looks like cat vomit That's absolutely true.

Correct.

Well done Dave Absolutely, correct and anyone who does like curry it follows likes eating cat vomit.

That's true Well, it's not very nice because millions of people like curry

I loved it's one of Britain's favorite listen Joe I love curry do you I was thinking of having one tonight in fact as a celebration for getting a lion someone heated up some fishy cat vomit do you and told you it was fishy curry do you think you'd tell the difference now I'm gonna think about it I'm gonna I'm gonna maybe have a look

Here's a good one from Lucy.

I can't eat peppers because a boy at school used to fold his eyelids back and it looked like the inside of a pepper.

That's a very good one.

That's perfect Lucy.

If this was a competition, which it isn't, you'd get a prize there.

So you get a theoretical prize.

That's pretty insane though.

She worked it out in her head that it looked like peppers or maybe the first time she saw a pepper it was like

Oh no, that's like Charlie's folded eyelids.

I'm not eating that.

Dan in Woking, here's a very good one.

He doesn't like baby corn because it's pretentious.

What's wrong with normal sized corn?

That's a good point.

Yeah, well done Dan, absolutely correct.

Emma in Huddersfield.

I've never eaten cottage cheese because it looks like someone has already chewed it up and spat it into the tub.

We'll have some more of these in just a second.

First, here's a trailer and then we're going to have some music from the Small Faces.

BBC 6 Music.

The year 1997.

The conquering hero was greeted as if he'd brought back the World Cup.

From the memorable... This accepted the majesty of the Queen's fine offer to form a new administration of government in this country.

to the forgettable.

Katrina and the Wave wallet for the United Kingdom.

We celebrate the best music of the year.

Join us for the class of 97 throughout Bank Holiday Monday.

On six music.

And wouldn't it be nice to get on with me neighbours?

They make it very clear, they've got no room for rain.

They stop me from grooving, they bang on the wall.

They're doing me trusty, they smell good at all.

Maybe Sunday afternoon, I've got no mind to worry.

I close my eyes.

sitting in a rainbow

I'll sing you a song with no words and no tune I'll sing in your party while you suss out the moon It's lazy Sunday afternoon I've got no time to worry Close my eyes and drift away

do do do do

There's no one to hear me, there's nothing to say And no one can stop me from feeling this way, yeah Crazy Sunday afternoon I've got no mind to worry Close my eyes and drift away

Lazy Sunday afternoon I've got no mind to worry Close my eyes

ah that's good isn't it come on lazy sunday by small faces i like the way that he does the first half of that song in his cook he's kind of crazy not me little voice and then the second half he just decides to go rock with it you know lazy sunday afternoon

of weird but it works and that's what it's all about hi yes adam and joe here on six music just covering for sean keithney for a couple of weeks uh that's joe clearing his throat there it's quite a manly sort of edwardian cough very good away from the mic polite i like it

uh we're involved in uh the nation's favorite feature text the nation we've been asking you to tell us your highly immature food dislikes you know food that you dislike for no rational reason and that you've disliked since you were a small child and maybe now you're in your late hundreds and you still dislike it for the same reason infantile aversions that kind of thing you know we were talking about uh i've got a problem with cauliflower

because it's like eating brains uh someone joe's got a problem with rice pudding because it's like maggots and milk yeah here's a good one from brin in bed that's uh i think his bed rather than a place he says i can't eat or she would that be what sex would brin be brin yeah there's absolutely no telling no telling

He or she is saying, I can't eat mushy peas because it looks like someone's been collecting bogeys and forming a large green ball of snot.

Well, mushy peas, I mean, that's a disgraceful food.

Yeah, that's quite an obvious one there, Bryn.

But no, very good nonetheless.

Absolutely.

Stevie Sticks from Hull, is that a real name?

Stevie Sticks?

I hope it isn't.

I hate raisins because they look like shriveled up rabbit droppings.

That's exactly what my five-year-old son said the other day, so that's proving.

Really?

But they're delicious.

Well, they are.

They're lovely and that's what I said to him.

I was like, go on, just try one.

No, they look like rabbit poos.

Here's a connected one.

You know what would be good with these texts is to know your age as well.

That would be interesting to know how old you are to have these really immature thoughts.

Here's one from Aiden in Ballymena.

He says, and this is a very common one, garibaldi biscuits are thousands of dead flies mashed up and no one will sway me on that.

Again they're delicious.

They're known in some places as dead fly biscuits, squashed fly biscuits aren't they?

I think so.

And here's another very good one.

This is from Wendy.

She says I can't stand the thought of eating sandwich spread because it looks like sick.

When I was going out with my husband before we were married we'd get back to his place and he would make sandwich spread sandwiches.

no they are they are revolting says wendy uh we've got a few more of these coming up for you but uh first here's juliana hatfield with her three and a track called spin the bottle

He's a movie star, only drives rented cars Met him in the bar, said I know who you are Took him to my party as the games were starting Bottles on the ground, are you ready now?

When it comes to me, I'm gonna be ready

I can hardly wait

Everybody's watching, everybody's looking She's such a sucker He is gonna kiss me if he doesn't miss me I'm ready for a dream

Juliana Hatfield three with spin the bottle.

It's time now to hear a couple more texts just before we go to the news from our feature text the nation and we're asking people to text in kind of infantile aversions to various food stuffs.

Yeah.

OK.

You ready for some good ones?

Go on then.

Rob in Birmingham has an aversion to drinking apple juice.

Can you guess why?

Is it anything to do with urine?

Yes.

I don't like drinking apple juice because it looks like stale wee wee.

Rob from Birmingham.

I'd imagine Rob's in his late 20s probably.

He's going for the cloudy apple juice, is he?

Is he?

Well you can get it cloudy or clear.

Yeah.

Just like the real thing.

It does!

I wonder what... yeah let's not go there anyway.

There's all sorts of things we could talk about if we were a late night program but we're not.

Here's somebody anonymous who's saying my stepson won't eat choco hoops since his dad cruelly said that they were rabbits bum holes.

Oh dear it's all basically fairly lavatorial.

One day he'll realize what sort of thing is that

to do to your stepson.

Imagine the shock on the poor child's face.

Plus it's true they are rabbits bumholes.

I happen to know there's a big factory somewhere in the northeast.

Rabbits in one end, choco hoops out the other.

They don't even know what choco hoops are.

They're rabbits bumholes.

Tim in Brighton says, weird food dislikes, colon.

I can't eat pork scratchings anymore.

Why do you think that is, Adam?

Pork scratchings?

Pork scratchings, are they like giant bogey?

No.

Do you ever see those pictures of like Indian guys who've got incredibly long toenails?

Oh yeah.

Tim in Brighton says I can't eat pork scratchings anymore they remind me of my brother's fungal nail infection.

No one's going to be able to eat anything.

No exactly.

One final one and this is I really like this one this is from Robin Sheffield this is good because it's just ridiculous but yet it has a kind of element of truth about it.

Tomatoes are repellent says Rob as appetizing as a bag of pus.

Only genetically modifying them to grow in sachets could correct this.

As tomato ketchup?

Possibly, yeah.

I know what you mean, Rob.

It's that sort of popping thing, when you pop a... I never used to like tomatoes, but you know what?

I've got into them recently, and they're very good, especially for men.

They make men more manly.

Well done.

You're a grown-up.

But no, I used to dislike them for the same reason, because when you pop your fork into them, it's like popping a fork into an elf's head.

Into a giant red bubo.

Okay, now it's time for the news.

Digital radio.

Digital TV.

BBC 6 Music.

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